


Without The Force

by its_amboo



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Coruscant (Star Wars), Eventual Fluff, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Romance, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, How Do I Tag, Hurt Obi-Wan Kenobi, It's not the jedi way, Jedi can't form attachments, Obi-Wan Kenobi is a Mess, References to Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008), Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-04
Updated: 2021-02-27
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:49:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 22
Words: 27,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25711627
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/its_amboo/pseuds/its_amboo
Summary: You've never been one with the force, never even knew what it was or if it existed. Even though the Jedi council were on Coruscant, you were accustomed to a different life style.So when Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi turns up in a bar you were at, you were surprised. You were even more surprised when you managed to help him catch a thief...
Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi & Original Female Character(s), Obi-Wan Kenobi & Reader, Obi-Wan Kenobi/Original Female Character(s), Obi-Wan Kenobi/Reader, Obi-Wan Kenobi/You
Comments: 15
Kudos: 100





	1. Going somewhere?

**Author's Note:**

> Hello there ;) Let me know if you all enjoyed this, or just let me know if I even published this (I may just keep this in my drafts for me to read for myself haha)

Coruscant was a large planet, and while there were those like the Jedi council who were respectable, they weren't the sort you were often meeting. For Coruscant was also home to the scum of the galaxy, one above the nobodies on the outer rim; those who were void of morals and had been cast aside by respectable society were more your speed. They gathered in bars and clubs, hovered in the dark streets, and used questionable methods in order to feel anything more than emptiness. 

You were one of those people, someone who would do nearly anything to keep your head above the water. It wasn't a glamorous lifestyle, but it was one you were stuck with. Rough, unhinged, and plagued with the others suffering the same fate. There were no routines, you did as you liked when you liked and so did everyone else. In the depths of Coruscant, there was chaos, and those living in the large towers were too high-up to see it.

~~~~~~~~ 

If there was one night you'd always remember, it was this one. You were in some bar or another, a nameless tavern with the strongest stuff around and a surprising lack of rules. The lights were dim, tinted red just enough to make everyone's face the same shade of tan, shadows darker and deeper than usual. You were leaned against the bar, sinking another drink, hoping to have enough so you would be too far gone to worry about the price. Music played softly from the speaker overhead, and while it was dark, you could still spot an unusual character from across the room. 

A stranger, and one that didn't look at home in a place like this. He was wearing robes, cream, with a brown cloak. His hair was a light brown in places, more ginger or blonde in others, and his face screamed superiority. He was the leader type, probably looking for a stress-reliever, but he held himself to a high standard as he walked closer towards the bar you were leaning against. You heard him order, voice sharp and strict, and he ordered what could only be described as a modest drink for somebody like you. 

His eyes cast around, and as people from the very worst places brushed past, you could almost feel his nerves rise. He didn't look right, a clear-headed man in a room of monsters. Perhaps he was a senator? Or a Jedi? You weren't one for politics, and you had never seen the Jedi up close, barely even heard of them if it wasn't for the legends that spread similarly to the fog on a cold morning. He certainly looked like how you imagined such a man would look, but you wouldn't dare ask. You were almost repulsed by the notion that a man so well-off would mock you by coming here out of choice. You were stuck in this cess-pit, and here he was soiling it with his grandeur. You wanted to spit at him.

And then suddenly, he jumps up, hands grabbing at his side, clutching around nothing.

"My lightsabre!" He cries out, scanning the room like a mad man. Maybe the barman had slipped something into his drink.

He starts hurrying about, grabbing people and demanding to know if they had seen his 'lightsabre'- whatever that was. You watched as he kept searching for it, people stepping back to give the clearly deranged man space. Then without warning he stops, staring at something. This would pass, right? This outburst must be some sort of drunkenness, granted you'd never seen it before. The upper-class, always behaving so oddly. 

You decide to go with it though, just to witness how far he would take this. You follow his gaze, and spot somebody running from the bar, and seconds later the stranger is following. You weren't much of a runner, but you manage to keep up, the stranger chasing this poor man like an animal. They turn a corner and disappear into an alley, you do the same and see the man is gone, but the stranger is still there. 

"My lightsabre!" He says again, searching desperately for where the man had got to.

You knew the alley well, had used it a few times when escaping someone unfriendly, or to avoid paying for your drinks at the end of the night. You brushed past the stranger and jumped, a fire-exit ran just above you, and you could grab the railing to swing yourself up. You did, the metal clattering underneath you as ran along, past the back wall of the alley where you could jump down on the other side. You supposed someone with super-powers could just jump the wall, but you weren't that lucky. This method worked though, and you were soon face-to-face with the man again.

To your surprise, he looked guilty, though most people round these parts did. He was holding something, a metal tube thingy which looked intricate and oddly beautiful. You go to ask about it when somebody lands just behind you.

"That's mine," The stranger points to the metal object, his hand passes by his face for a second, "You will give it to me." 

"I will give it to you," The man replies, handing it over. You step away, unsure of what's happening. 

The stranger nods to the man, who leaves the way he came. You're star-struck.

"You jumped that wall," You say with admiration.

"I did," He doesn't seem to share your confusion

"But if you could do that, why not do it before?"

"I didn't think it were possible for him to get over," He smiles, "You showed me that it was." 

You feel oddly pleased to be of help, and decide to question him further,

"What's that?" You stare pointedly at the metal object in his hand,

He presses something and a blue beam erupts from one end, glowing like a star, bright and shining in the darkness. "This is my lightsabre."

"What's a lightsabre?" You reach out to touch it, he pulls away

"It's the weapon of the Jedi, don't touch it." He waves it, spinning the beam around. You're transfixed on the movement and the sort of buzzing/droning noise it makes.

"You're a Jedi?" You ask, "I've never met a Jedi before,"

"I am, Master Obi-Wan Kenobi, and you are?"

" _Master_ Obi-Wan Kenobi?"

"That's my name, what's yours?"

"Y/N, just Y/N."

"No last name?" He chuckles, "Or are you too informal for that?"

"It's L/N, but people don't tend to use it."

"Y/N it is, thank you Y/N, you helped me get my lighsabre back." 

"No problem?.." You are still skeptical, squinting in the dark to see him properly, studying his face, his hair, his eyes a pale yet deep green, verging on turquoise. He hadn't been ruined by the filth surrounding you, but he had certainly seen things. He looked solid, like rock, built to defend and protect. But he wasn't damaged, no he was perfectly in-tact, just a little sharp compared to the relaxed environment you lived in. He was different, and you liked different.

"Master Obi-Wan?" You wanted to ask him more, but he shook his head.

"No more questions," He said, "Save them for next time,"

"Next time?" You ventured

"I have a feeling we'll meet again," With a small smile he jumps, clearing the wall before you can even think about following him. 


	2. Familiar faces

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You don't think much about the strange encounter, until you see them again...

It was a while before you saw them again, but you couldn't be sure how long exactly. Night and day were rather similar, and one too many drinks had the nasty habit of putting you out of action for days. Not that you minded that, but it still complicated the act of measuring time.

Suppose it was fate that drew you two back together, the maker playing games, rolling the dice and forcing the pair o

f you to cross paths. You wouldn't have missed the man if he didn't return, it would become another story to tell over drinks, or something you would chalk up to a dream or high of sorts. Lighsabres, Jedi, magic powers, they seemed the stuff of legend rather than reality.

Either way you did meet again, though you would have preferred it be under different circumstances. You were traversing the streets, only a few drinks deep, and your mind was elsewhere as it usually was. You paid no mind to the strange creatures you passed, drunken, hostile and often stinking of some combination of awful things. They grumbled and yelled, swayed and sung loudly, creating the background noise you grew to tolerate over the years. They were helplessly ruined, all of them, and you felt some pity as you bent down to snatch a bottle one had left beside them. They were sleeping peacefully and all free drinks were good drinks. 

You were happy as you drank the stolen beverage, or at least the closest thing to it. Nothing could bring you true joy, true joy costed money, and required friends, you had alcohol and that made you at least think you were happy. You pondered it as you turned a corner, heading back to the grimy flat you called home where you could pass out on the mattress and wait until the throbbing in your mind stopped. 

Who needed a job? Or money? Or life or a future? You fell sideways against a wall to breathe for a minute, holding the bottle by it's neck, swishing it around and delighting in the noise. It was then that somebody approached you, probably looking for some of your drink. You eyed them up as they grew closer to you, slimy and reeking of cheap cologne.

They smiled at you and grabbed tightly the wrist holding the bottle, you dropped it and gasped as it splashed against your leg.

"That was mine!" You cried, tugging against their grip.

"It looked like good stuff" They didn't listen, and their breathe was rancid as they leaned in closer, "money, now"

"No!" You spat at him,

"Well then, my boss look for girls too. Money or I take you to him." They were awfully close, baring yellow teeth at you

They held a knife to your neck, cold and barely scratching into your skin. You fumbled in the small bag you kept around your shoulder and shoved a few credits into their waiting hand. 

"Is not enough," They complain

"It's all I have," You bargain, and you weren't lying, 

"No good enough, I have to take you as well," They seemed happy at the idea, "Business is business, you understand?"

You wanted to try calling for help, but they pressed the knife deeper, reminding you of your situation. Not like anyone would come to your rescue anyway.

"Please, leave me alone," You kicked forward, but the solid form didn't move.

"Come on, boss is waiting."

They pinned one arm behind your back, leading you once more onto the main street. A few people turned to watch as you were escorted towards a building. You were still trying to fight, wriggling out of their grasp, trying desperately to move away from the blade dangerously close to cutting you.

"Y/N?!" You heard a familiar voice, one different to the usual around here. Craning your neck, you could just make out a figure cloaked in brown running your way.

"Master Obi-Wan!" 

He nodded to you, snatching the knife and turning it on your attacker. He's grabs their arm tightly before they can run.

"Are you hurt?" He asks

"No, no, but they took my money." You straighten yourself out, regathering as Obi-Wan forces them to hand back your credits.

~~~~~~~~~

He decides to walk you back to your flat, discarding the knife in an already over-flowing rubbish bin.

"You know, a thank you wouldn't go unnoticed."

"Thank you? For what?" You asked, counting your credits again to make sure you got them all back,

"For saving you,"

"I didn't need saving."

He laughs, "You were being mugged."

"I'd already been mugged actually," You argue, "I was getting kidnapped."

"Still, a thank you would be nice."

"Thank you Master Obi-Wan." You smile at him, 

He chuckles again, and the smell of alcohol lingers on his breathe as well as on his clothes. 

"It's Master Kenobi, not Master Obi-Wan." He explains when he spots the confusion on your face

"I prefer Master Obi-Wan though." 

He doesn't argue back.

When you arrive at your place, one of many in a large block, he grimaces and stalls.

"Aren't you coming inside?" You ask, holding open the door,

"I should go back to my own quarters," He says, 

"You shouldn't go home yet, will there be anyone around?"

"I should think so, why?"

"You've been drinking," 

"How do you know that?" He asks defensively,

"Come inside." You open the door wider.

He does, and you know he finds it repulsive- so do you. It's a barely furnished flat, mold grows up the walls and along the ceiling is a variety of odd patches from where something had leaked through the room above. You didn't like it much either, nothing worked and anything that did was on it's last legs. You sat on the mattress on the floor and patted the space beside you,

"How did you know I've been drinking?" Asks Obi-Wan, with no intent of sitting next to you,

"I can smell it on you, not just your clothes, but your breathe." 

He turns away,

"What are you doing around here anyway, there must be other places to drink." You knew you certainly wouldn't be here by choice.

"I drink to de-stress, being a Jedi isn't easy and-"

"And all the places near you are posh enough to remind you of the very reason your stressed?" You finish his sentence, which catches him off-guard

"Yes... How did you know that?"

"I don't know, just a hunch." You got up to walk closer to him, "You crave a different life? Well here is as different as it gets." 

He takes a minute before responding, "I should take you back to the temple," he says at last,

"So you can blame the smell of alcohol on me?"

"Partly, and because it's dangerous here, you should have some sort of basic self-defense knowledge." He puts a hand on your shoulder, 

"I can look after myself, I don't want your magic powers." 

"No, nothing like that. Just some fighting techniques, I'd hate to see you getting kidnapped again."

You squint at him, trying to make out what he means. Does he care about you? That was certainly something new, nobody had ever cared about you before, not like he did. He held some sort of authority over you, but in a kind way. People didn't have control of you out here, you looked after yourself, Obi-Wan was something different entirely. He was mad, what good was their worrying about other people?

"Fine, but I can look after myself." You said reluctantly, frowning at his smile.

"Good, come on then, let's go." 


	3. Heat of the moment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Obi-Wan teaches you how to defend yourself

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> why is it so hot in england????? jebfhbwrfbfdiifnjn i'm going to melt!!!

The Jedi temple was not a building you were familiar with. You supposed from the high towers of the rich, it could be seen from even the furthest reaches of Coruscant, but in the depths where you lived it was impossible to see. It was large, foreboding almost as you crossed the threshold and shivered at how cold the air was. The atmosphere was crisp, not muggy like you were used to, and the air had the slight scent of something sweet and light, dancing around you. The temple was subtle in most aspects, from the plain yet rich clothes the Jedi wore to the stone beneath you from some far-away system that you had never even heard of. Everything had the underlying tone of luxury, and to the untrained eye or the even wealthier senators it looked selfless and modest. Maybe it was in comparison to the lives others lived, but to you it was Heaven. This was the home of the angels, golden and glowing like no other place you had ever seen. 

The lights were dim as Obi-Wan led you through the maze of hallways, all identical yet somehow identifiable. It was night, and the temple seemed to be shut-down, not busy and hectic like you assumed it would be. Doors were solid and as such you had no way of knowing what was behind each one, though you longed to explore every crevice of the building. Shadows were plentiful but not completely solid black, more grey or murky brown as you looked around for any sign of life. You felt oddly at ease; the building, whilst physically quite chilly, felt warming. Obi-Wan knew the place well, guiding you through yet more hallways until he stopped before a door.

"I shall have to warn you, I will not go easy on you."

"Oh don't worry, Master Obi-Wan, I'm tougher than I look." You smiled at him.

He opened the door and you stepped inside a large room. It was somewhat bare, aside from the soft mats on the floor and the benches that lined the far-back wall. The training room of the Jedi was not as you expected it to look. You thought they would be more challenging, with more obstacles to test the superpowers they seemed to hold. This looked perfectly normal, which made you relax slightly.

To say you were nervous would be a small understatement, you didn't fear the Jedi, you feared your own incompetence and more-than-likely failure. The Jedi were strong, physically tough and supposedly well-trained, and you were a straggler. You doubted you could prove even slightly worthy in this scenario, but you didn't allow yourself to back down. Obi-Wan wouldn't hurt you, you felt sure of that, he was intimidating you, teasing you. You felt as if he could sense your fear (which he could).

"I will try to show some restraint," He says, throwing off his brown robe so it pooled behind him where he left it. "Are you ready?"

You nodded, though truthfully you were not. You took off your shoulder bag and put it on the floor, wondering what you should do next when Obi-Wan suddenly approaches you. You were stood before each other, now only about a foot or so separating you.

"If I were to try and punch you, what would you do?"

"Block it?" You ask, he nods.

He swings for you and you stick out your arm, blocking your face.

"Try and grab my wrist," He swings again, you do as he says, "Now you have control, what do you do now?"

"This." You throw his fist back at him, he loses balance for a moment, surprised by your rashness. 

"Oh, so you think you can handle me then? Without guidance?"

"I told you as much, Master Obi-Wan," 

"Very well." His confidence is thick in his voice.

He lurches forward, you turn sideways so he misses his attack. You didn't think it entirely fair, but instead of whining you kicked out, pressing your foot into his chest. He stumbles but doesn't fall, regathering himself and once more charging at you. 

This time, he's quicker in grabbing you, spinning you round so your back is pressed into his chest. You can feel his breathe on your neck, as well as the rise and fall of his chest. He's still composed as you try and get out. His arms are locked around your waist, pressing into you as you struggle more.

"Y/N, I advise you let me guide you normally, you cant win."

You don't respond, too busy thinking off a way out of his grip, your hands grab onto his arms, pulling desperately at them. When they don't budge, he laughs, which reminds you that his head is directly behind you. You throw your head back, and while the height difference means you don't hit him face-on, he does jolt backwards, his grip faltering.

You're free of his grasp, and turn round before he can grab you again. He's quickly surging towards you once more, but you swipe your leg across to trip him just before he can reach you. He falls, grabbing your arm as he does so to bring you down with him.

"I am going easy on you," Obi-Wan states, already trying to stand again

"You shouldn't." Your quicker to your feet, and kick him down once more. He grabs your leg, pulling you sharply to the floor.

Crying out, you try and scramble up again, but it's too late. He is stood over you, when you try to stand, he pushes you back down. He's sturdy, and no amount of pulling or kicking is working. You pant, raising your hands in some form of surrender.

Obi-Wan laughs, suddenly switching back to his usual self, helping you to your feet, "let me teach you properly, please"

"Fine," You brush yourself down, "You're stronger than you look."

"I know." His confidence has grown ten-folds, "You're not hurt, are you?"

"No, no, I'm fine." You collect up your bag, he puts his robe back on.

The two of you stand there, unsure of what to say when the door opens. In comes a small green man with a walking stick and wispy grey hair. He's old and somewhat weak-looking, you think.

"Master Yoda." Obi-Wan greets them,

"Who is this, Master Kenobi?" he points at you with his stick.

"This is Y/N, I was training her?"

"We have a new Jedi, I did not know." 

"She isn't a Jedi, Master, she's a friend." 

Yoda stares at you for a moment, before nodding, "I see. Food and drink, we must give your friend."

"I won't be staying," You interrupt, "I should really be off now."

"Outside, you must wait, Y/N. To Obi-Wan I must speak."

You nodded, stepping outside and waiting in the corridor for them. You had heard the name Yoda before, it was one that always arose when talking about the Jedi. You thought he would look different, but it was clear that Obi-Wan fiercely respected him, so you would too.

While you waited, Yoda spoke to Obi-Wan, his tone turning stern as he addressed his fellow Yedi,

"Obi-Wan, conflict I sense in you."

"Conflict, Master?"

"Hmm yes, great conflict. Now not, but soon you will feel it." He hobbled closer, looking into Obi-Wan's eyes.

"What sort of conflict?"

"Make a choice, you will need to make. Follow your feelings, Obi-Wan." 

He nodded, though he was unsure of what he was agreeing with. He felt it might concern you, but he couldn't think why. 


	4. 04- Whine & Dine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You eat dinner with Obi-Wan and a less welcome guest.

Master Yoda seemed the slightly odd sort. Apart from his way of speaking which always seemed to catch you off guard, he was just a little off. Obi-Wan never mentioned it, never even raised an eye. You were lucky that Obi-Wan didn't talk like that, for it was sure to ruin the mystery and curiosity surrounding him. He had a presence, one of confidence and grandeur. 

Normally that sort of attitude would be off-putting, but he somehow managed to pull it off. He didn't come off as snobby or cocky; rather he made you want to prove yourself to him, for he was certainly somebody worth impressing.

As you sat down at one of the tables in the dining hall, you wondered what life would be like as a Jedi. It seemed quite luxurious, with the grand hall you were sitting in proving your point and then some. It was dim inside, but only because most of the overhead lights were off, leaving the three of you submerged in an amber shadow. The three of you were sat around a small table near the door, and you were opposite Obi-Wan. Sat like this, you could almost ignore the small green figure beside you, but not for long as he would then speak up and you'd be forced to listen.

You wanted Obi-Wan to yourself, to talk to him alone without Yoda, but you daren't ask him to leave you. You wanted to get to know Obi-Wan, surrounded in the luxury of his Temple, basking in his wisdom and daring to invade the bubble of allure around him. What you craved most, however, was to hear him say he cared about you, that he was worried for you. You had only seen it for brief moments, but the idea that somebody had you in mind was enough to make you feel dizzy.

Nobody cared about you back down there, they only cared about themselves and getting drunk to forget their own problems. Everyone was suffering so much that they couldn't bear the burden of you as well. It was selfish to impose your own issues on people, but Obi-Wan seemed almost willing to accept them. You saw it in his eyes, the hope and optimism that you so desperately lacked- he had everything you were void of and it was intoxicating. 

Whatever did you do to deserve to meet him? He was made for somebody like you, had to be. Had the Maker been so merciful so as to create this being for you? He met your gaze for the briefest moment and you flushed, almost sure he could hear your every thought. If he could, you wouldn't mind. You would never admit it aloud, but somebody like this was exactly what you needed: strong, brave, courageous, selfless and generous. His eyes were too strong to stare into, they burned with all of his compassion, and they hurt to look into, glowing and sparkling with him. 

You forced yourself to look away, ashamed of how much you admired him and so soon. A droid buzzed over and delivered food wordlessly. You thanked them, not knowing what else to do, and they nodded. Master Yoda began to speak before you could even begin to eat,

"A room for tonight, Master Kenobi will give you." He states,

"A room Master?" Obi-Wan looks to him, you were sure he was looking at you first.

"Yes, a room, for our friend."

"That won't be necessary, I can go home."

"Back to your grimy little flat?" Obi-Wan asks, you nod, "That place will make you ill if you sleep there any longer, one night would do you good."

"If you insist, Master Obi-Wan, but I don't want to be any trouble-"

"Trouble you will not be" Yoda interrupts, he nods as if to confirm what is happening before starting his meal.

Truth be told, you were starving. The stuff you did eat down there was greasy and fried, laced with more oil than actual food- not to mention the taste. The Jedi seemed to spare no expense, and that extended to what they ate. It had to be infinitely better than the slop they served back home, and you thanked the Maker you had agreed to come here. If you hadn't, you would be asleep on your mattress by now, cold and hungry and desperately alone. Even the silent presence of Obi-Wan opposite you was more than enough. 

~~~~~~~~~~

However if you thought that dinner was nice, than the rest of the night was like dying and going to heaven. Master Yoda bid you goodnight after eating and you finally got some spare moments with Obi-Wan. 

"I'm afraid you'll be staying in my quarters," He says as you walk down the halls together.

"Really? If it's too much trouble, I can just go home."

"No there's no trouble, you just might want to adjust your expectations." He opens a door and walks in, you just moments behind.

His quarters were beautiful. Not in the intricate, artsy, glamorous way, they were just beautiful. Homely, in shades of brown, beige and cream .The bed was just before you, with a door on the right and a sofa on the wall to your left. Obi-Wan hung his robe on the hook beside the door and put out his hand,

"Your bag?" He asked, and you obliged, giving it to him so he could hang it beside his own robe. 

"I'm afraid it isn't much" he continues, "But it's only for the night."

"This is better than any room I've ever slept in!" You exclaim, shocked by the notion that this 'wasn't much' as he put it.

You sat down on the sofa, sighing at the softness when he spoke up again,

"You can have the bed of course, and the refresher is through there," he points to the door, you jump up again,

"Are you sure I can have the bed, I don't mind,"

"You're the guest, it's only polite manners," he says, much to your excitement, "I'll go and shower, make yourself at home."

You did, kicking off your shoes and laying down on his bed. It was soft and comforting and you wanted to cry. Nobody had ever treated you with such kindness before! You grabbed one of the many pillows and hugged it to your chest, inhaling the scent of both him and the unfamiliar smell of cleanliness. It was heaven and it was for you. 

When Obi-Wan returned,  
dressed in his bed clothes (plain, full-length pyjamas that were cream like everything he wore), you had to get up and hug him. At first, he was shocked, but soon you felt the sensation of his arms wrapping around,

"Master Obi-Wan, thank you." You whispered, holding him tight, scared you were dreaming and he would soon fade from view. He didn't reply, but he squeezed you tighter to let you know he had heard you.


	5. 05- Sweet dreams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You spend the night in the Temple

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again! I don’t know if I mentioned this, but I do have this story on Wattpad as well! My username is the same, but it’s less popular on there, so any love would be appreciated! :D xx

Sleeping was not usually something you were good at. Unless aided by a drink or two, sleeping was almost impossible. Your block of flats was loud, and the paper thin walls did nothing to block out the city's noises. You rarely slept at night, instead staying awake till dawn when your tiredness would get the better of you and you would fall in and out of consciousness until the evening. It wasn't preferable, but there seemed to be nothing to do about it.

You were still unable to stay asleep, and at some point in the early morning you awoke. It was probably sometime after midnight, and it was eerily quiet. This was odd, the utter silence surrounding you, and you felt uneasy. Grabbing the duvet, you pulled it up to your chin, staring into the darkness. The room was too big, too spacious for your liking, and while you could make out the shape of the sleeping Jedi, you couldn't see anything else. Obi-Wan shifted in his sleep, and you watched him carefully, unsure of what else there was to do. He seemed peaceful, his chest rising and falling beneath the thin blanket he was covered with. You blinked, squinting slightly in order to see him clearer.

You were on edge. As you tried to fall back to sleep, rolling over onto your side, you tried to think if something else. Your mind seemed transfixed on the Jedi, specifically the one currently sleeping in the same room as you. Tomorrow you would go home and forget about him, but right now you couldn't let the thought pass. There was something about him that was oddly intriguing, he drew you to him in some way. It wasn't really one thing, more him as a whole, his aura, the feeling that surrounded him. 

But you didn't want to think about that, you just wanted to sleep.

"Y/N?" You heard a groggy, almost irritated voice break your thoughts,

"Is that you Master Obi-Wan?" You sat up, seeing him do the same,

"I sensed you were awake, is everything alright?" He moved towards you, you felt the mattress dip where he sat at the end of the bed.

"I'm fine, I just don't sleep much." 

You could see his eyes in the dark, kind and welcoming as he nodded.

"I see, well, try and get some more rest. Wake me if you need anything."

"Master Obi-Wan?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you for checking on me, but really, I'm fine." You smiled, unaware if he could see you, "At home I rarely sleep at all." 

"That's not good, you deserve more than that." He shifted further up towards you, his hand placed itself atop yours. 

You smiled wider, his hand much larger and warmer than yours. He covered yours completely, which made you feel safe.

"That's kind of you, but I really don't feel very welcome here. It's sort of weird..." You trailed off, his thumb stroked the back of your hand,

"As long as I am here, you're safe." His voice was soft yet genuine, "That's a promise, Y/N."

You nodded, you saw the vague shape of him doing the same. He didn't move, though you thought he would. Your eyes felt heavy once more, and you laid back down. Suddenly, you were tired again, and you closed your eyes, hearing Obi-Wan whisper soft encouragements. Something in the back of your mind thought he had done something to make you tired, but that was quickly silenced by your overwhelming need for sleep.


	6. 06- Are you sure?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s the next morning, and you’re alone...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What’s this? Two chapters within minutes? Just kidding, I actually wrote the last chapter yesterday but forgot to post it whoops :) x

When you awoke, Obi-Wan was gone. It was still rather earlier, and the chill in the air made you want to go back to sleep. He must have left early, though you wished he had woken you as well. 

It was a nice morning, and you wished you could look out of a window, but there weren't any. You thought it a cold, yet clear, sort of day, and you wanted to breathe in as much fresh air as possible. Soon you would be back in the depths, and then you would really long for a morning like this. You could feel the grease already, imagine the choking gases that made up the air around you. You felt slightly nauseated just by the thought if returning.

Silently, you got out of bed, laying there you had realised it smelt of Obi-Wan,  
worn and sort of like the whiskey he drank when he visited the bars. There was the underlying tone of fire, warming and invigorating. You liked the scent, but the thought of a hot shower was much more enticing. The water always ran cold at home, mainly because you never paid your bills, and you felt almost giddy as you turned on the shower- so hot that steam started fogging up the mirror. 

The refresher wasn't large or luxurious, but it worked. As you scrubbed yourself clean (stealing some of Obi-Wan's stuff to do so) you imagined what it would be like to live here. Hot water everyday and a boundless amount of things to do. You would explore every room in the Temple, even the rooms of other Jedi, just to see what they were like. 

You dressed, and the thought of other Jedi struck you again, they would be everywhere now. The Temple would be crawling with them, what would they think of you? How would you explain your presence to them? Then again, it couldn't be unusual for another person to turn up; a Jedi's friend or lover perhaps (not that you were either of those). 

The door opened and you were stood in the hallway. You realised you didn't know how to get out, or whether or not you should find Obi-Wan first. You thought you should, to thank him again, but where was he? You saw somebody walking towards you. He was green, dressed in similar robes to Obi-Wan. He looked friendly enough,

"Excuse me?" You stopped him, he turned to you with a smile,

"Hello there, who are you?" 

"Y/N, I'm looking for Obi-Wan?" You weren't sure what to say, but the Jedi didn't seem the judgemental sort,

"Master Kenobi should be in the communications room by now, would you like me to take you to him?" He turned his head to gesture down the hall. You nodded.

"Thank you er-"

"Kit Fisto." He smiled again.

Kit Fisto was nice, you liked him a lot. He didn't talk much as you walked the maze of halls with him, but in the same way that Obi-Wan felt compassionate, he felt kind. 

"What are you doing here anyway, Y/N?" He asks, "I don't think Kenobi has ever mentioned you."

"Well we've only really just met, he was teaching me self-defence. It was getting late, so he let me stay the night." You explained, hoping he wouldn't press further.

Kit hummed, but didn't say anything else. Had you said something wrong? He sounded curious, but his politeness got the better of him and he let it slide.

When you arrived, you saw Obi-Wan, Yoda and another two men gathered around a hologram. Yoda, being shorter than the rest, was sat on a floating chair. They seemed to be talking to somebody, but one of the unfamiliar men - who was bald and stern looking- shut it off upon seeing you stood there. 

"Master Fisto, who is this?" He asked, not taking his eyes off you,

"This is Y/N," He replies calmly, a hand resting on your shoulder, "She was looking for Master Kenobi."

"It's alright Master Windu," Obi-Wan says, approaching you, "She was just on her way home."

"I wanted to say thank you, Master Obi-Wan, for letting me stay. I hope I'm not interrupting anything important." 

Obi-Wan chuckled softly, "Of course not, and you're very welcome."

"Bye then Master Obi-Wan,"

"Goodbye," He lifted his eyes from you to Kit, "Would you show her out?"

"Of course." Kit placed his hand back on your shoulder, leading you gently out of the room.

~~~~~~~~

As you said your goodbyes and thank yous to Kit, Obi-Wan was left to answer to his fellow Jedi.

"Who is she Obi-Wan?" Windu asked, not amused.

"She's a friend."

"A friend," His tone was serious, and he refused to continue work until he got answers.

"Teaching his friend, Obi-Wan was." Yoda spoke up, 

"Friend? I didn't think you had friends Obi-Wan?" Said the other Jedi, whose name was Anakin (though you didn't know that).

"Anakin, you're my friend." Obi-Wan felt himself become frustrated by the constant attention on him. 

"Very well, Master" Anakin sensed his anger and decided to leave it

"I don't like the idea of allowing people to come and wander the Temple." Complained Windu, "Who knows what she would have done if she hadn't found Master Fisto."

"She isn't a threat!" Obi-Wan interrupted suddenly, not wanting to hear anymore about the topic. Anakin smiled at his outburst, and Windu seemed taken aback. The room fell silent.

"Right, Obi-Wan is. A threat, the girl is not."

Windu was quiet, and turned on the hologram sheepishly. They continued their work without any delay, each one hoping to forget the conversation they had just had.


	7. 07- It must be fate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You and Obi-Wan find each other... again...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! :D This chapter is a little longer, and I’m hoping the rest will be as well. Also, somebody recommended this idea so I hope I did it justice! :) xx

It wouldn't be long until you and Obi-Wan saw each other again. You thought you saw him sometimes, as you sat alone at the bar or table somewhere. You would see somebody who at the very least looked an awful lot like him. You could never be sure if it was Obi-Wan, and you weren't keen on the idea of going over and asking.

You knew Obi-Wan was embarrassed by his habit, running away to a bar and drinking hardly seemed the type of thing the Jedi allowed- let alone encouraged. He was ashamed that he needed those drinks, but you didn't see it as a real problem. He didn't rely on alcohol as such, in fact he could function perfectly without it, but it made him feel normal. People drank, people went out and did imperfect things- they made mistakes. Obi-Wan was not allowed the privilege of such things, so he pretended. You had seen it before in others, and you had seen the shame in his eyes that time when you met and he saved you. 

It was an odd habit of yours, but your curiosity grew the more you thought of the Jedi. You had to know all about him, and his secrets. Not for blackmail or for any reason at all, but because you wanted to listen. He was an interesting person, and his actions were even more curious- both the Jedi business and the drinking. You had never met anyone other than those from the same strand of life than you, and you knew far too much about that. Sometimes a clone soldier would end up in a bar, but they never stayed long, much too put off by the smell or the other patrons. Obi-Wan was so different, and yet you felt connected to him in some way, like you fit together despite being opposites. 

~~~~~~~~

Had you known any better, you might have avoided going out that night. It was raining, which was rare enough, but the rain actually managed to weave through the tangle of buildings above and reach you, which was stranger. Some might have called it a bad omen, you called it refreshing. It was still warm, however, and the droplets of water hit your skin beautifully, shining in the green and orange hues of the underworld and making you glisten. You felt oddly calm, so calm that you didn't see the bundle of robes as you entered the bar. 

You were so mesmerised by the weather as you ordered your drink, you couldn't get the feel of the rain off your mind. You were sat a few stools away from them, and you could barely make out their voice- though it certainly sounded agitated. 

"I don't need to pay for my drinks," They muttered, hand waving across their face. Were you any more observant, you would've recognised the gesture. 

"No! You have to pay!" The barman replied, slamming down the glass they were drying with a rag. 

"I don't need to pay for my drinks," They tried again, voice more strict. You watched the two curiously, but you still didn't put two and two together.

"You do! What do you think you're doing?" 

The tensions seemed to be rising, and the man turned to leave, his half-finished drink abandoned on the bar. You thought that was the end of it, until the barman followed him outside.

"You! Stop!"

You got up hurriedly, leaving your own drink to watch. It was still raining, and the figure was now running away, easily dodging the confused onlookers that had stopped walking to witness what was happening. The barman was growling something in their native tongue, and after the man refused to stop, began chasing them. Despite being sloppy in their navigation, the barman was fast and was soon catching up. 

Maybe you should have left it, gone back to your drink and waited for the alcohol to cause you to forget, but you didn't. Instead you held your bag tightly and followed in pursuit, the rain still spitting above. You were used to running, and whilst you weren't the most physically fit, you still managed to keep both the barman and the robed figure in sight.

The three of you hurried through the maze of alleys and streets, lead by the anonymous man. You weren't sure why you were following them, but there was something about the adrenaline pumping through you that made you hunger for more. You liked the excitement, the uncertainty of not knowing what was happening, having to rely on reflexes rather than careful thinking. Every day was the same for you, and these quick bursts of something new were refreshing, like the rain above. 

Suddenly, the barman stopped sharply, and you did the same, almost slipping on the slimy pavement beneath you. You had both lost sight of the man, which made the barman cry out in frustration. They said something else in a language you didn't speak and sulked off back to the bar, making sure to glare at you as they did so. You stood, with the rain falling on you, in the street, searching for the man. It seemed like they had disappeared into thin air when you heard something shuffling beside you.

You turned, and saw the man fighting out of their hiding place. They had been crouching between two bins in a small alleyway, and were struggling to free themselves of the tight spot. You approached and offered your hand, which they accepted. Their hood slipped off of their head, and all of the puzzle pieces finally clicked together.

"Master Obi-Wan?"

"Y/N, I thought it was you."

"What are you doing? Angering the barman like that? You'll get yourself killed!" You stepped backwards, giving them space.

"I thought it would work," Said Obi-Wan,  
brushing themselves off and laughing, "I didn't want to spend all my credits."

"You can't just ask for free drinks!" You argued, 

"I wasn't asking, I was trying to make them," He didn't seem phased at all,

"How?"

"Jedi mind trick, it only works on the weak-minded. I thought the barman might have been included in that group."

"Oh, not around here. You have to be clever to run a bar, otherwise you'll have all sorts tricking you." 

Obi-Wan laughed again, which made you scowl.

"You've got to be more careful! Hanging around here isn't easy, and you hardly fit in!"

"Fit in?" He asked, you gestured to his robes.

"These! They're too clean, and too... posh!"

"I am not posh!" He exclaimed, but not in full seriousness, "Fine, what do you want me to do?"

"Come with me, you could do with something else to wear." 

~~~~~~~~

Taking a Jedi shopping was not on your agenda for the night, but it seemed important right about now. Obi-Wan followed obediently, though you had to be careful to avoid running into people. If someone saw you, they'd probably go running to tell the barman, and then you'd be in trouble. 

The depths of Coruscant weren't known for their expansive range of shops, but there was always something. You took a left and weaved through some more alleys, carefully stepping over the drunken men and women, until you came out onto another semi-popular street. Obi-Wan seemed repulsed, both by the place and by how unbothered you were. You grew up doing this, and you would surely die doing it too, there was no point being disgusted. 

When you found a store, you were surprised to see it open. It was small, and smelt stale as you pushed open the door to allow both you and Obi-Wan entry. A bell clanged above the door and somebody emerged from the back room.

"Bit late for customers, ain't it? Still, business is business- come in!"

Obi-Wan was relived to be out of the rain and began sorting through the seemingly endless amount of clothes. There wasn't much rhyme or reason to how they were sorted and many were simply thrown into boxes to be looked through. You felt nervous, and quickly went to Obi-Wan's side.

"Are you alright?" He whispered, still rummaging,

"Yes." You answered quickly, "This place is odd, isn't it?"

"It must be for you to think so." He said. He picked up a tunic and scrunched up his nose. "I think some of these clothes are old."

His voice had grown louder, but before you could silence him, the owner spoke up,

"Of course they're old! Don't get new clothes around 'ere. Fresh off the street, these are- or fresh off the dead."

Obi-Wan dropped what he was holding. 

"Don't be like that, Master Obi-Wan. We've got to find you something to wear." 

He mumbled something that you couldn't hear, before reluctantly continuing his search. You pushed back the hair from your face and helped, determined to leave this stale little shop as soon as possible.

"I don't want to be wearing the clothes of a dead man," Obi-Wan sighed as you held a robe in front of him.

"It's that, or you become a dead man." You reasoned, "Think this'll fit?"

"Fine. But I don't like it." 

"Neither do I, but you can't be wandering around like your are now."

"You know what you're doing, why don't you hang around with me, protect me?" He grimaced as he spotted a shirt with a rather large blood stain. 

"Because if you remember, I can't protect myself, let alone you." You folded up the robe and put it over your arm to buy it, "I believe you promised me more than one self-defence class?"

"Does it mean I won't have to wear this?"

"No, but I'm saving you again, so you owe me."

"Alright," He sighed, "How do you keep doing this?"

"Saving you? I don't know,"

"Every time I'm in trouble, you're there." 

"It must be fate," You joked, "Now wait there, I think I just saw something perfect."

Obi-Wan dressed quickly. You had asked the owner if you could do so in the back room and they happily obliged, knowing you were going to be handing over plenty of credits. You helped, mainly by turning your back and holding his own clothes that he threw at you. He grumbled slightly, which was almost comedic, complaining at the smell and feel of the worn clothing.

When he finished, you turned back around. He only looked slightly different; dressed in shades of navy and black rather than cream and brown. He pulled on the dark robe you'd found and waited for your approval. He looked near enough the same really, except a variety of stains were blossoming all over him, something that his old clothes lacked. 

"Well?" He asked, annoyed by your silence.

"You look like you've lived here your whole life!" You grinned, knowing it would bother him.

"Great. Now, can we please go?" 

"Go where?" 

"I want to get a few more drinks in before I go back to the Temple, then tomorrow you can have some more lessons."

You nodded, still holding his old clothes. The owner gave you a bag for them as Obi-Wan reluctantly forked over the cost of his new outfit.

"Well, Master Obi-Wan, you've not exactly gained from this experience." You smiled up at him as you stepped outside, the rain still falling.

"What do you mean?"

"You did end up spending all of your credits after all."


	8. 08- Back again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You return to the Jedi Temple

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again! Sorry if updates are a little slow, I’m on holiday :D x

"What are you doing?" You asked Obi-Wan, who was staring pensively into his drink.

The two of you had found your way into a bar, sitting together in a booth as you drank. Obi-Wan was a lot slower than you, savouring the taste (which was hardly worth savouring) as you raced to finish yet another glass.

"Thinking." he replied eventually,

"About?"

"You." He smirked, "And your nasty habit of running into me."

"I can't help it." You shrugged,

"Oh, I have no problem with it. The council however-"

"The council?"

"The Jedi council, they're not impressed."

"So? I don't do it on purpose."

"Everything happens for a purpose, that includes our meetings."

"And what purpose is that?"

"I don't know... But i'll figure it out." He sounded certain, his face hardening as he spoke.

"Why bother? There's no point figuring out the reason, because if it's bound to happen, it's bound to happen."

"I don't understand..."

"Exactly. And it's better that way. Understanding why something is happening just makes it more painful, because you realise you still can't stop it." You trailed off,  
taking another sip of your drink as Obi-Wan spoke.

"But I don't want to stop it?"

"Then why worry about the reason?"

"Because that's what I'm supposed to do." He sighed

You shrugged, "Well I'm not supposed to do anything."

He hummed, swirling the liquid in his glass, his face shadowed by the dim lighting. His eyes were glazed over as he thought, and you looked into them, hoping to see what he was thinking about. It must be important to him, because he seemed to almost freeze, barely blinking as his  
mind continued to be elsewhere.

"Master Obi-Wan? You don't dislike me,  
do you?"

"No, of- of course not. Like I said, the council are unsure of you."

"Well then," You smiled, "I'm sure they'll be excited to see me again."

~~~~~~~~

And they were, or at least, they were excited to see Obi-Wan.

"Master, where have you been? And what are you wearing?" Asked the young man you had seen in the communications room,

"Sorry Anakin, we ran into a little trouble and I needed a disguise." Obi-Wan lied through his teeth. It wasn't the most convincing lie, but it seemed to work.

"We? Oh, Y/N."

"Hello" you greeted him with a little wave. 

"Y/N, this is Anakin." Obi-Wan took the bag of robes from your hand as he spoke, "I better get these horrid clothes off."

He left you and Anakin alone, who scratched the back of his head awkwardly,

"So, how did you and Obi-Wan meet?" He asked,

"I helped him stop someone stealing his lightsaber, and then he saved me from being kidnapped." You laughed it off, realising how crazy it sounded.

"Right, and what sort of trouble did you get into tonight?" His voice dripped with slyness

"I-we.. um.." You weren't sure what to say, not wanting to get Obi-Wan in trouble, "Well..."

"You can tell me he's been drinking, don't worry." He chuckled upon seeing your relief,

"He got into a argument with the barman, he sticks out like a sore thumb down there."

"Down there?"

Oh. Maybe you shouldn't have said that. You tried to think of something when Obi-Wan returned, dressed once again in his Jedi clothes.

"I see you two are bonding, but it's getting late. You should be asleep already Anakin."

"I could say the same for you," He raised an eyebrow, Obi-Wan frowned.

"Point taken. Come on Y/N, i'll give you that lesson tomorrow." 

You followed him back to his room, where he once again allowed you to sleep on the bed. You accepted gratefully, you weren't sure how you ever slept on that mattress before- the bed was so much better.

"Master Obi-Wan?" You called out. It was dark, the lights haven been turned off moments ago, and Obi-Wan was lying on the sofa,

"Yes?"

"Tomorrow, can you wake me when you get up?"

"Are you sure? It's quite early," He sat up slightly, leaning back on his arms,

"Yes please, if not I would have to find my way around alone." 

"Alright then." You could almost here his smile in his words, "goodnight, Y/N."

"Goodnight Master Obi-Wan."

~~~~~~~~

He did wake you the next morning, gently shaking your shoulder until you stirred.

It was still dark, and Obi-Wan was leaning over to look at you as you slowly blinked in the darkness.

"I told you it was early," he said, "you can go back to sleep if you'd like."

"no, no, just give me a minute," you rubbed your eyes and smiled up at him.

He looked different like this. His hair wasn't fixed, and it hung loosely over his face. He kept trying to brush it back, but without whatever gel he used, it didn't stick. His face was still relaxed by sleep, not yet creased or poised like it usually was. You liked this version of him, calm and playful as he stepped back to let you get up.

"Come on, we'll be late to breakfast."

You nodded, getting up and dressing. Obi-Wan went into the refresher whilst you did so, emerging minutes later with his hair in place. You missed the rougher look, but you didn't say anything.

Breakfast took place in the same room you had had dinner in, except it was much busier than before. People from all over the galaxy gathered to eat, each one dressed in the same style robes. The room was filled with light now, but the crowds made it look smaller than it actually was, filling it with background chatter and the clinking of cutlery. You and Obi-Wan took a table near the door, and it was already occupied by two other Jedi.

"Y/N? I didn't know you would be back so soon!" Kit laughed as you sat down, you shrugged,

"Neither did I."

"She can't stop herself from running into me," Obi-Wan explained, which made the other Jedi- Anakin- raise a brow.

"You don't seem to mind, Master."

"Anakin, of course I don't mind."

He hummed, which wasn't on its own an annoying sound, but it was thick with his own ego and self-esteem, which gave you the impression that he thought himself better and smarter than you or Obi-Wan. That was frustrating, but you didn't say anything.

You picked at your food a little, it wasn't as nice as dinner, but it was still enjoyable. You felt a little guilty eating it though, you weren't a Jedi, and you didn't have any reason to be here other than your accidental encounters with a Jedi. Of course they weren't pleased with you being here, Obi-Wan had said as much. Obi-Wan watched as you pushed the food around,

"Don't you like it? There's other stuff,"

"No it's not that," You took a bite to prove your point, but you body almost refused to swallow it.

"You friend feels as if they are not worthy," Said Kit, who was looking at you kindly with those big eyes of his.

"Really? Why not?"

You sighed, "Well I'm not a Jedi, and I'm not training to be one, so I just feel as if I'm not...welcome here? Does that make sense?"

"Of course you're welcome," Obi-Wan set down his knife and fork, "But if you want to go home, you can."

"No I like it here, with you and Kit and even a  
Master Yoda isn't too bad-"

"I didn't here a mention of my name,"

"- And you of course, Anakin, but... I don't know... It's something else..."

"You can tell me, whatever it is," Obi-Wan's voice was sincere,

"You'd probably think I'm being silly,"

"I would never."

"It's like there's this bad feeling I get whenever I come here, like something bad is going to happen..." You didn't finish your sentence, trailing off, searching that feeling for some reason as to why it's there,

"I feel it too, but a bad feeling shouldn't put you off, it's a new place- it's going to feel different." 

"You're right," You sighed, "Maybe I'm just a little nervous,"

Obi-Wan placed a comforting hand on your shoulder, which Anakin hummed at again. 

"Thank you for listening though,"

"If there's something bothering you, Y/N, all you have to do is say."

You nodded, believing every word he said.


	9. 09- Suspicion and deception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You and Obi-Wan have another training session

During the day, the training room was much more full. Little droids hummed through the air, shooting blasts for the Jedi to block- blindfolded that is. You jumped out of the way of one and Obi-Wan chuckled,

"You clearly have a lot to learn." he said

"We're going to train here with everyone else?" You asked, ducking as another droid flew over you.

"Of course, is there a problem?"

"I didn't really think anyone would see me..."

Obi-Wan shrugged off his robes, ignoring your complaints. That annoyed you slightly, but you didn't speak of it.

You were stood face-to-face in the centre of the room, lights from above painted Obi-Wan with a softer look, and yet it still managed to highlight the dark circles around his eyes. He didn't look tired, he looked almost like a biblical figure, stood before you with his body positioned, ready to attack.

He was slower to act this time, taking the moments to circle you, watching your every movement and flinch as he deliberately stepped too close for your liking,

"Remember, you said I was allowed to mentor you properly."

"Yes Master Obi-Wan," You said through gritted teeth, spinning round as he continued to encircle you.

His gaze never left you, building up anticipation as he stared you down. You spotted Anakin from across the room, watching you from a distance as Obi-Wan finally lunged for you. You dodged, and Anakin smiled at that.

What was he staring at? You thought as you blocked another attack from Obi-Wan. He leant against the wall, arms crossed as he watched the show unfold. You looked away, embarrassed and frustrated by the idea of him watching you. You knew you would undoubtedly lose to Obi-Wan, and you didn't really want anyone to see. Huffing, you stepped back, shooting Anakin another glare.

"Y/N?" Obi-Wan paused, tilting his head at you,

"I'm fine, keep going."

He nodded, before grasping his lightsabre. You faltered as the blade was ignited, glowing and humming in his hand,

"Don't worry, I won't hurt you."

He spun the blade expertly, wielding it as if were an extension of his own hand rather than a separate weapon. He swung at you, and you barely escaped the heat of it, the blade buzzing just above your head. Your feet felt unsteady beneath you, threatening to give way as your nerves built with each attack.

"You'll never be able to wear out a Jedi," Said Obi-Wan, "We recover much faster than you, you'll have to defeat them instead."

"How?" You asked, jumping as he swung for your feet,

"First, de-arm me." He spun the sabre again, tossing up in the air to show off what he could do.

The flash of blue made you stop and think, how could you ever take that off him? He seemed so skilled, how would you ever do this? Your eyes cast back to Anakin, who was still watching, smug as ever. You narrowed your eyes and followed the way the lightsabre moved, looking for any moment where you could reach out and grab it.

You saw the opportunity, the small pause in spinning when the blade reached its peak. You outstretched your hand, grabbing for it, but Obi-Wan was quicker. He moved his hand and the lightsabre dropped. Instead of gripping the handle, you barely grazed the shock of blue.

Crying out, you pulled your hand back, eyes clenching shut, a burning pain seared through you. Obi-Wan put the lightsabre away as you fell to your knees, clutching your hand to your chest. Obi-Wan knelt down, and gently took your hand,

"Oh dear, I'm so sorry, are you alright?"

"Yeah, yeah, I barely touched it."

"Poor thing, I'll get you to the medical room, it looks a nasty burn." He was studying your injury, your palm facing up in his, so much smaller than his own. You flushed at the sensation of his finger tracing the out-skirts of your injury.

~~~~~~~~

Obi-Wan helped you walk to the medical room, slowly, still holding your hand up. He was gentle, but he had an almost fascination with your injury, constantly checking to see how it changed during the small walk.

The medical droids were much friendlier, cleaning the burn with a soothing substance before dressing it. You laughed when they asked how you did it, admitting you had tried to grab a Jedi's lightsabre. The droids didn't laugh, and neither did Obi-Wan, who was watching them treat you.

You ended up sitting on a bed, Obi-Wan beside you in an armchair.

"Are you sure you're alright?"

"Yes, Master Obi-Wan, it's nothing."

"You're aloud to be hurt, you know. And you shouldn't laugh about your injuries."

"It's nothing. I'm fine."

He took your hand and rubbed his thumb gently over the bandages,

"I didn't mean to hurt you."

"I know."

"I'll never let any harm come to you again, I promise." He folded your fingers over in your palm, placing his hand on top. It was a gentle gesture, a promise, and you felt content.

You ended up falling asleep on top of the covers, Obi-Wan not leaving your side until you did. It was only a small nap, but when you awoke you found somebody else sat in the chair,

"Master Skywalker?"

"Y/N, are you ok?"

"I wish people would stop asking me that."

"I worry about you,"

"You shouldn't, you saw what happened to me, you saw it wasn't anything major."

He stood up, and you sighed, rubbing your eyes with your good hand. You weren't sure what you thought about him, he seemed to have won the affections of Obi-Wan, but he was yet to convince you. He seemed slightly different to the other Jedi, maybe it was his darker robes, or maybe it was his silent observations, or his annoying little hums. Either way, you were displeased to see him,

"I was only watching to see if you were as talented as Obi-Wan thinks you are," He smiled,

"He said that?" You sat up slightly, interested

"No, but I can sense he likes you. For someone he barely knows, he trusts you a lot. He never liked me that much when we first met."

"Jealous?" You matched his smile with your own,

"No, but I want to know why."

"I don't know why, we just keep bumping into each other."

Anakin hummed, which was still annoying, and seemed to accept your response,

"Fine, I'll ask Obi-Wan why."

He left without another word and you rolled over on the bed, deciding another nap was in order to forget that encounter. If anyone wanted you, they would have to wake you up.


	10. 10- Getting lost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You wake up in a place you don’t recognise, and you can’t find Obi-Wan...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! I hope you enjoy this because it’s an idea I’ve had for a while and I’m so glad I finally get to write about it!! :D

You did get the nap you wanted, but when you awoke you weren't sure where you were...

It was a dark room, cold and desolate and you couldn't see anything other than your hands in front of you. You were sat on the floor, pulling your knees up to your chest as you grit your teeth. It was freezing, and you were scared, pushing yourself backwards until your back hit the wall. 

"Hello?" You called out, hoping someone else was with you,

Nobody responded, and you forced yourself to stand, your legs were weak beneath you. You put your hands out in front of you as you walked, feeling for something, anything in the room. There was nothing aside from a door on the far wall, which was locked. You pulled on it desperately, hearing it rattle, echoing loudly.

The room wasn't very big, but the emptiness made it feel limitless as you sat down in one of the corners. You felt so trapped, but also overwhelmed by the sheer loneliness of your surroundings. It occurred to you that this was no accident, somebody had done this to you, locking you inside. To starve? To die? You knew you had probably upset more than a few of the barmen back home, but this was something special.

You felt like crying, realising that this could very much be the end of you. Nobody would notice that you were missing, nobody back in the slums, not even anyone in the Temple. Obi-Wan would probably think you had just gone home, and he wouldn't go looking for you. You were going to die in this room, and nobody would even know. You hugged your knees, lowering your head in order to muffle your sobs. You had never been one for crying, and even now you automatically tried to stem the flow of tears.

What time was it? How long had you slept? Who had done this? You thought back to the medical room, the way Obi-Wan had promised you would not be hurt again. He was so certain, and you had believed him, but now you were lost and he wasn't coming to save you.

~~~~~~~~

Meanwhile, Obi-Wan was on his way back to the medical room. It had been a couple of hours since he had last heard from you, and you weren't anywhere to be found. He had checked the canteen, the training room, he had even asked Master Fisto if he had seen you- he hadn't.

He opened the door to the medical room and frowned when all the beds were empty. The one you had been sleeping in was still messy from where you had laid, but there was no sign of you. Anxiety was starting to flutter around in his chest, and his stomach dropped when the medical droid said they hadn't discharged you. He left the room, his entire body weakening with your disappearance.

The force seemed to be crying out, as if Obi-Wan had to find you. The force was demanding he went looking, making him feel more unwell with each second he wasted. Where were you? He decided meditation was in order to clear his mind of his growing nerves. His footsteps echoed off of the empty halls, and he quickened his pace, trying to escape the loneliness that you had filled. He felt stupid, how long had you known each other? Not long, and yet he was determined to find you, he wasn't sure why you had such an affect on him.

The meditation room was already occupied by Master Yoda, which made Obi-Wan even more anxious. Would Yoda sense his thoughts about you? He tried not to think about that as he sat down and closed his eyes, instead focusing on his breathing. Yoda was an immense presence beside him, and he found himself struggling.

"Your friend, you are worried about her." Yoda spoke suddenly, still sat with his eyes shut,

"I can't find her,"

"Home, maybe she went."

"No, she would have told me."

"What makes you so sure?" Yoda finally opened his eyes to see Obi-Wan was already looking at him, "Her own person, she is."

"I can sense she is in trouble, I feel as if I have to find her." Obi-Wan confessed, running a single hand through his hair.

Yoda hummed, "Finding it difficult to understand, are you?"

"Master Yoda, I've never felt so worried about someone before."

"Give you the answer, I cannot. Meditate, you must."

"I can't, all I can think about is Y/N."

"Good." Yoda got up, hobbling over to the door, "That is the idea, is it not?"

Obi-Wan remained silent, closing his eyes again. You refused to leave him, and he couldn't control his anxieties for much longer. Meditation didn't help with finding you, but it did make Obi-Wan ponder about why he cared so much, something he wanted to think about after finding you first.

~~~~~~~~

It was difficult to sleep on the cold, hard floor, but you didn't have much else to do. You felt hungry, and weak, and completely helpless. The thought that nobody would even notice your absence brought yet more tears to your eyes and sleep seemed the only escape. You curled up, trying to retain body heat, teeth chattering as your forced your mind to shut off.

You slept in small amounts, waking and falling back asleep several times. Your body no longer tired, but your other pains growing more persistent. With each sleep, the idea that someone might be looking for you grew less and less likely, and the reality that you were alone grew more and more painful.

After what must have been hours, there was a noise, one not caused by you. You scrambled to your feet, when the door opened just a crack and somebody stepped inside. They hushed you, and you could make out the rough shape of a tray in their hands.

"Who are you?" You asked, raising your hands in case they tried to hurt you.

"Y/N." They ignited their lightsabre with one hand, still holding the tray in the other. The light illuminated their face. You froze.

"Master Skywalker?!"


	11. 11- Guinea pig

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anakin explains to you why he's taken you, and Obi-Wan continues his search

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! I really enjoy writing this story, and I'd love to hear how you guys feel about the pacing :) I'm trying to go for slow burn/mutual pining sort of thing, but I'm very new to this so I'm not sure if I'm doing it right! Anyways, I hope you enjoy :D x

"Anakin? What's going on?" 

Anakin ignores you, slowly approaching you and setting down the tray of food just before you. The blue glow of his lightsaber is slightly off-putting, too kind and peaceful in comparison of what was happening. You pick up the tray of food and pick at it, noticing how similar it was to the food in the Jedi Temple. 

"Listen, I'm not going to hurt you-"

"So you're the one who kidnapped me," You glare at him, hoping he could make out your face in the dark, "Why?"

"That's what I'm trying to tell you. Please, just listen to me."

"Fine." 

He sat opposite you on the floor, holding his lightsaber up so you could see the worried look on his face. He looked truly sorry to be treating you like this, but he clearly had his reasons.

"I'm trying to prove something, but don't worry- Obi-Wan will be looking for you soon."

"When he finds out you did this, he'll be furious."

Anakin shook his head, "No he won't, because he won't know it's me."

"I'll tell him," You warned,

"No you won't, Y/N."

"Why not?" 

Anakin shifted closer, despite being the only people in the room. 

"Because that would ruin my experiment. I'm trying to prove that Obi-Wan cares about you, that's it."

You pulled a face, busying yourself with eating rather than talking,

"I'm married, did you know that?"

"No, who are you married too?"

"A senator, but nobody can know about that. Attachment is forbidden in the Jedi order, and with the senate marriage is only really seen as a political benefit." 

"Oh, that's terrible, but what does this have to do with me?"

"If the council discovered I was married, I'd be forced to leave the Jedi forever-" He shifted where he was sat, "I think Obi-Wan is catching on, but if I can prove he's attached to you, he'd be a hypocrite to tell the council."

"So I'm a guinea pig? A lab-rat to prove your theory? Obi-Wan isn't coming, Anakin, nobody cares that much about me."

If it wasn't for the cold, desolate surroundings, you would feel as if you were suffocating. This situation was so awkward, it expanded in your chest and put pressure on your heart. You watched Anakin process what you had said, still illuminated by his lightsaber, the only recognisable thing in the room. Even Anakin looked different, more cruel and not like the person you thought he was. 

"Y/N, I need to go through with this, both me and Padme need this to keep ourselves safe."

"Is Padme your wife?"

Anakin nodded, 

"And you love her?"

He nodded again,

"Would she want you to do this?" 

"No, but I'm doing this for her."

It was your turn to nod, understanding his perspective, but not entirely confident that he was making the right decision.

"But I don't understand, how do you know that Obi-Wan is looking for me?"

"You might not have noticed, but Obi-Wan does care deeply about you. I can sense it."

You sighed, finishing your meal and handing the tray back to Anakin, 

"Fine, you better go then, in case he turns up."

Anakin stood silently, and you watched him leave, hearing the click of the lock cutting you off from the world once again. 

~~~~~~~~

Obi-Wan was still rushing around the Temple. Now he couldn't find Anakin either and he was really starting to worry. He had double-checked his room, knowing it was probably the only room in the Temple you knew aside from the canteen. He stood in his room, tapping his fingers against his leg in an attempt to calm himself, thinking of where you could possibly be. Maybe you had just gotten lost? You had probably gone wandering and couldn't find your way back, so he would have to search the entirety of the Temple to find you. How long would that take? It didn't matter, Obi-Wan thought, he had to know you were safe.

The silence he walked in left a void for his mind to fill. Without the company of you or anybody else, he was forced to occupy his mind with thoughts, which he didn't much like the idea of. He was thinking about you, about how scared you must be, about his promise to protect you and about how terrible he felt for breaking that promise. He would make it up to you, he vowed to himself. Anything you wanted and it was yours, if only he could find you... 

Why did it matter so much to him? He had never felt so deeply before, not even when Anakin ran off on a mission with what could only be described as a death-wish. It was such a confusing, convoluted mess of feelings that he didn't have the time or ability to sift through. He let them grow and expand, developing with each second. It was like something was alive inside of him, taking the form of the butterflies in his stomach, dancing and jumping around with such energy. He tried to swallow them, not wanting anyone to see him like this. It had been so long since he had felt this way... Not since... No, not now. It was difficult enough already- he didn't need to think about them right now.

~~~~~~~~

You waited patiently, Anakin had assured you that Obi-Wan was coming and you thought about what you should say to him. You couldn't mention Anakin, but what else could you do? If you didn't tell Obi-Wan who took you, then he would have to find out for himself, and then he would know you had lied to him... That thought scared you more than Anakin did. You didn't want to lie to Obi-Wan, not when Anakin had said he cared about you. He cared about you! That was a brilliant thought, but you would ponder that later, after you figured out what to do when Obi-Wan found you. Maybe you could say you had gotten lost, say you were looking around and accidentally ended up here- wherever here was. 

It couldn't be far, you reasoned, if you said you were just looking around and the door had locked behind you, would he believe you? Unless you were miles away and that sort of thing was impossible, but you wouldn't know until he arrived, so you stopped thinking about it and instead traced the lines in the floor with a finger, following the crevices as a way to ease your boredom.

~~~~~~~~

Who knows how long it had been, but Obi-Wan eventually found the right room. It was right there in the Temple, down a long stretch of corridor occupied by storage mostly. There were some other rooms that even Obi-Wan didn't know the use for, but he didn't have time to worry about that. He tried a door and found it locked, knocking harshly, he heard scuffling on the other side and then a voice,

"Who is it?"

"Y/N? It's me, are you alright?"

"Master Obi-Wan! Yes, I'm fine, but I can't get the door open!" Your voice had grown louder as you walked closer to the door.

Obi-Wan stepped back, igniting his lightsaber,

"Stand back, Y/N!"

He sliced the door where the handle was, cutting the lock in two and allowing the door to open. You stood there, with the same stunned expression you always had when he did something new and he smiled,

"I'm glad to see you're alright," He hugged you tightly, "What happened?"

"I don't know" You half mumbled into his back, "I was just having a look around and- I'm sorry."

"Don't apologise, it's ok. You're safe now, that's all that matters."

"I was so scared, I thought nobody would come looking for me- that I would be stuck in there!" 

Obi-Wan squeezed you tighter, 

"Oh Y/N, I'm so sorry, I promised you wouldn't get hurt again and here we are." He collected himself, having to take several deep breathes in order to do so, "I'll make it up to you, whatever you want."

"Anything? Really?" You pulled away to look him in the eyes,

Obi-Wan nodded, 

"Have a think about it, but first let's get a drink."

You sat opposite him in the canteen. You turned down his offer of food and instead sipped at the tea he had gotten for the both of you. It was calming, and he was still reassuring you whenever he thought you looked worried. 

"I think I know what I want, Master Obi-Wan," You said at last,

"What is it?" 

"I want to go with you on a mission,"

He paused, frowning. His brow creased as he thought about it, 

"That's very dangerous, Y/N."

"Please Master Obi-Wan, I want to see something new. It's so boring back home, I'd give anything."

"Very well," He gave in, "I'll try and sort it with the council."

~~~~~~~~

It wasn't until that night when Obi-Wan joined you in his room that you heard the good news,

"The council didn't like it, but you're allowed to come with me."

You were laying on the bed, fresh out of the shower, a smile broke out on your face,

"Really?!" You got up and pulled Obi-Wan into his second hug of the day, "Thank you Master Obi-Wan! When do we go?"

"It's not for a week, but the Council thought it best you stay here to ensure you're ready." He had wormed his way out of your grip as he spoke, "Are you really this excited? I could have just taken you in a ship to see any planet of your choosing-"

"But this is different! This is so- so unreal! Anyone can travel, but going on a mission with a Jedi knight? That's something really special."

"It is, and it's also incredibly dangerous..." He couldn't help but worry about you,

"Does that mean more training sessions?" You laughed, which was finally enough to make Obi-Wan chuckle along with you,

"Yes, I believe it does."


	12. 12- Are you sitting comfortably?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You and Obi-Wan set off on your mission.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all! :) This is a bit of a filler chapter. It doesn't have much plot, but I really liked writing it, so hopefully you enjoy reading it! :D x

The week passed almost without you realising. You spent your time training with Obi-Wan, who taught you far more than you thought necessary. By the end of the week, you even stood a chance in hand to hand combat with him, and you could fire a blaster quite well, hitting your targets with surprising accuracy. Nobody, not even you, expected you to be this well-prepared, especially when Obi-Wan made it extremely clear you would not be doing anything he deemed 'too dangerous'. 

Honestly, you were surprised he agreed at all. He spent an awful amount of the week trying to convince you to change your mind, warning you of the risks and the dangers. It didn't matter how many times he tried, you had your heart set on joining him, and he couldn't do anything to change that. So instead, he scrubbed you up into somewhat of a fighter, making sure you knew how to everything from reading a map to how to properly address the clone troopers you found would be assisting you and Obi-Wan.

He even made you start calling him 'General'.

The training followed by worrying followed by yet more training was almost comforting though. You fell into a routine: waking up at the same time as Obi-Wan (who, despite your best efforts, refused to even let you spend one night on the sofa); going to the canteen for a nutritious, but not amazingly tasting breakfast; training until both of you were sweating and you were panting like an animal before retreating to the library where you and Obi-Wan would trade stories over tea. 

It was nice to have a constant in your life. Before it had been constant drinking, with little bursts of excitement to keep you going, but in the Temple there was the perfect blend of routine with something new everyday. You often made time for Kit, who you had befriended quickly and often joined you in your training sessions to keep you motivated with his encouragement, as well as other Jedi you familiarised yourself with. It was mostly out of politeness, you weren't exactly a 'people person', but then again it didn't seem like many Jedi were either. You learned to recognise certain names and faces, but you rarely stepped out of the bubble of people you actually knew.

That of course meant seeing Anakin more times than you would have liked to. You were relieved to hear he wasn't going you on your mission, but he seemed to have gotten over what happened a lot quicker than you had, which wasn't that surprising.

If Obi-Wan could sense something was off between you, he didn't let on. He simply let Anakin tag along, ignoring your grimace whenever he sat down beside you or intruded on you and Obi-Wan in the library.

You weren't _scared_ of Anakin, you just weren't confident in your ability to not let anything slip. That, and he seemed far too comfortable with you, which was disturbing. Then again, you knew about his wife, something nobody else did, which gave the two of you some sort of bond you couldn't seem to shake. You went along with it, mainly to avoid the awkwardness of exposing him to the council.

~~~~~~~~

When the week was finally up, however, you had no problem leaving Anakin at the Temple. Carrying your bag of personal belongings on your shoulder (clothes as well as a few blasters that the Jedi were kind enough to give you), you pretended to be almost sad to be going.

You were genuinely going to miss Kit, as well as the Temple itself. You were even going to miss Yoda, who sent you off with what was probably _supposed_ to be words of encouragement, but sounded more like something someone below would say after a particularly rough night. 

Obi-Wan gave Anakin a final goodbye, bowed to Master Yoda and hurried you on board. You were off to some planet on the outer rim, and you couldn't wait. Obi-Wan assured you it wasn't anything worth seeing, mostly bogs and rivers, but you were still bouncing in your seat as the ship took off. 

It didn't take long for the 'stay in your seat' rule to be broken as you jumped up and ran to the window. 

"Y/N, please, I don't like flying as it is." Said Obi-Wan as you leaned over beside him to look out on the city.

You were already so high up, and you were only getting higher. It was so beautiful, the buildings shining in the sun, so small and identical from this height. You couldn't even see the streets of the depths from here, though they could probably see you. Would they know it was you in the ship? All those barman you never paid, the people you passed by everyday- would they know? Probably not, but it was nice to imagine it. How jealous they would be! You waved at them, picturing them waving back, which made Obi-Wan laugh.

You laughed along, before reluctantly sitting back down because you could he would not let it go. You gave him an overly-exaggerated salute and sighed, contently watching the clouds pass by.

~~~~~~~~

Being on a ship was not as exciting as you imagined it would be. There were no metal-eating monsters to fight off, no pirates tried to board, even Obi-Wan was boring. He stayed in the cockpit, constantly checking the navigation system and asking every five minutes if you were alright,

"Yes General Obi-Wan, I'm fine." You spun around in your seat, the discovery that the seats span was the most exciting thing so far.

You watched as Obi-Wan flew you away from Coruscant past the stars. It was beautiful, honestly, but not the heart-racing adrenaline-fuelled adventure you hoped it would be. You tried counting them as you went by, but Obi-Wan said it was annoying so you were forced to stop.

"I'm trying to concentrate," He says, adjusting his grip on the wheel, 

"Concentrate on what? There's nothing out there." You pointed at the black abyss, the vacuum you were travelling through blinked with its millions of stars.

"On flying," Obi-Wan frowns, "I don't like it."

"Don't worry Obi-Wan, we're fine." 

You reach out towards his seat with your foot. Testing the waters, you nudge the seat, delighting when it began to spin much like yours. Obi-Wan takes his eyes of the controls before him to glare at you,

"Don't you dare."

You don't reply, just try spinning the chair again, this time in the opposite direction. With no verbal disagreement from Obi-Wan, you push again. Spinning his chair one way then the other, smiling at him as you do so.

He's trying not to smile back, not wanting to give you the satisfaction. He focuses on flying, but his hands are pulled off the wheel as his chair quickly spins. Round and round as you laugh, clapping your hands when you catch a glimpse of Obi-Wan's smile when the chair slows.

"Are you quite finished?" He asks, trying to re-gain control,

"Oh yes, thank you." You point back at the view, "See how nothing bad has happened?"

"What's your point?"

"My point is, you don't have to be serious _all_ the time, General."

"You don't get it do you?" He casts his gaze over you, "Playing around won't get anything done."

"But we're not doing anything anyway! Please, General, can't we at least try and make this a fun trip?" You pleaded with him, and he sighed- defeated.

"Fine."

You met his eye, and he finally allowed himself to smile at you. You smiled back, determined to make this an enjoyable trip, despite how serious Obi-Wan treated it. 


	13. 13- Sleep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You do a lot of sleeping on your journey

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if these chapters are a little boring, but I promise they're important! :D xx

You decided to have a look around the ship. It wasn't very big, equipped with basic weaponry and shields, not that you know much about that. You were more intrigued by the detailing in the walls, the buttons and levers that you dare not touch for fear of doing something drastic. Instead you just looked, imagining what it might be like to live on a ship, spending everyday flying, travelling the entirety of space just because you _could_. You had never been outside of Coruscant, and your world ended and began with the bars you called home. Even doing this, something so dangerous and potentially fatal was more than you could ever dream of. You needed the exhilaration of fighting, running, acting purely on instinct instead of waking up everyday knowing what you were doing.

The routine of your week in the Temple had been nice, relaxing, but nothing gave you the same high as this. Your primal instincts inside of you yearned to free themselves with each boring day that passed, and now you finally had the chance to use them, even if it would only be for one mission. Obi-Wan would probably allow such a thing to happen again, and that bothered you, you weren't sure you could go back to Coruscant, specifically not your home. It was too dull and drab. You'd think the depths would be interesting, and they were, but it got boring quickly; drinking, sleeping and scavenging for food and money was not how you wanted to spend the rest of your life.

Obi-Wan had mentioned that the journey would take a little over a day and that a room was waiting for you on the ship. After exploring all the corridors and hallways, desperately wanting to peek inside the rooms, you headed back to Obi-Wan to ask where your room was,

"Take a right just through there and it should be on the left," Said Obi-Wan, not really listening. He was still transfixed on flying, even though you had told him to stop worrying. You thanked him though and went looking.

What Obi-Wan struggled to mention was the fact that there were _three_ rooms on the left. The first one was clearly his room, mainly because all his things were packed away properly with his robe on a hook beside the door. You sighed, but then laughed, deciding it best not to snoop through a Jedi's belongings. You tried the next room, and it was yours. Sitting down on the bed, you yawned. Glancing around there wasn't much in the room aside from your bed, the dresser and your bag of stuff that you had brought with you. You remember leaving that bag at the entrance, so Obi-Wan must have brought it in. You smiled, lying down and yawning again. You felt less guilty sleeping on this bed, knowing that Obi-Wan had his own bed as well. Rolling over, you fell asleep at top the covers, the humming and gentle movements of the ship comforting you.

~~~~~~~~

"Y/N, we're almost there." Obi-Wan knocked on the door, waking you. 

"Ok General Obi-Wan," You got up, rubbing your eyes and half-stumbling towards the door, "What time is it?"

"Early evening, we'll meet with the clones and set up camp, you ready to go?"

You nodded, grabbing your bag and following Obi-Wan outside. You were excited to meet the clones after hearing so much about them. Obi-Wan had recounted several stories about them and their bravery, which made you eager to see them in action.

Outside, your feet sank into the sand. You breathed in, feeling the hot, dry air all around you. It was a dry, sandy planet; it was so different from the sticky, damp alleys of Coruscant and you loved it. Obi-Wan seemed to have a different opinion, already removing his brown cloak and drawing it over his shoulder,

"Tatooine, about as deserted as it gets," He says, slipping in the sand as he tries to walk towards the small town on the horizon, "We'll be meeting them in Mos Eisely, let's go."

You follow him, also struggling through the sand, but still incredibly excited. You'd never seen anywhere like this, and with the two suns shining overhead, you couldn't help but smile,

"I see you're excited," Obi-Wan kept turning around to make sure you were keeping up with him,

"I've never been outside Coruscant..." You admitted, somewhat embarrassed. Obi-Wan smiled,

"Well I promise you, it gets much better than this." He stopped walking to let you catch up, offering his arm for you to link your own through. 

It was easier walking with him, even when going up and down the hills, sliding and laughing when you almost fell, 

"Careful, I don't want any injuries on this mission."

You laughed harder, brushing the sand off your clothes. You'd never felt sand before, but you quite liked it. You had heard of the beaches on other worlds, swimming followed by bathing in the sun. The sand felt like fun, playful in the way it clung to your skin. Obi-Wan was grumbling about it getting in his shoes, but you didn't mind. It was refreshing, the new sensations surrounding you. You don't know why anyone would ever take something like this for granted.

~~~~~~~~

The clone troopers were intimidating when you first met them. They were stood outside of a cantina, still dressed in all their armour. It must have been hot in there, but they refused to even remove their helmets until you found a place to camp for the night. 

With the suns setting, a camp was set up under a rocky outcrop on the out-skirts of Mos Eisely. You sat by the fire as the troopers busied themselves with unpacking supplies. You had caught some of their names, but you were too busy staring into the fire to pay attention to them. It was still warm, but a chill was starting to creep up the back of your neck.

"Y/N?"

You turned to see Obi-Wan, stood behind you with an armful of stuff,

"I'm sorry, did you want some help?" 

Obi-Wan shook his head, "No, you're alright. Are you hungry?"

You nodded, and Obi-Wan set down what he was holding, sitting beside you. He took out a couple of packets of something, handing one to you,

"What is this stuff?" You pulled out a blue square of jelly, wobbling it slightly,

"I'm not sure, but there's plenty of it." He shrugged, turning to look into the fire as you had,

You shrugged, scrunching your nose as you dared to take a bite of the food. It didn't taste very nice, and from what you could tell, Obi-Wan didn't like it much either.

"We'll go back into the settlement tomorrow, I'll buy you something actually edible."

You nodded, shifting closer to him as the temperature dropped further. Obi-Wan let you come closer, even wrapping an arm around your shoulders.

"There's a nice place I know," He continued, "You'd like it."

"You've been here before?" You asked, looking up at him, head nestled on his shoulder.

He nodded, "Once, it's a long story. Qui-Gon and I were forced to stop here, it's where we first met Anakin."

"Qui-Gon was your master, right?" You felt Obi-Wan shift, "You don't talk about him much, what was he like?"

"He was a great man, much better than I'll ever be."

"Then why don't you talk about him?"

Obi-Wan didn't say anything, just pulled you in closer. You buried your face into his shoulder,

"I won't let anything happen to you, Y/N" His voice was shaky, uncertain but brave. 

You glanced up at him, noticing the distant look in his eye and the glaze covering them. He blinked harshly, trying not to cry. You felt terrible, but didn't know what to say, just snuggling closer as a way of comforting him. He was strong and solid against you and you felt your eyelids getting heavy. You yawned, but Obi-Wan didn't move, so you took it as confirmation that you were allowed to do what you wanted. Closing your eyes, you mumbled a goodnight, vaguely hearing Obi-Wan yawn and say something as well. You were warm, and you felt secure, his arm still holding you close to him, your heart fluttering as you fell asleep against him. 


	14. 14- Sooga and sourness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Obi-Wan treats you to breakfast

You wake up early in the morning, which is to be expected when lying against a living alarm clock. Obi-Wan got up at the crack of dawn, the two suns of Tatooine rising just above the sand dunes as you were awoken by the sudden loss of warmth. Yawning, you looked up at Obi-Wan with half-lidded eyes, he helped you to your feet,

"For someone who sleeps so much, you sure are tired a lot."

You didn't respond, instead watching as the clones (who were already awake) busied themselves with finishing preparations. They moved as one, with the occasional joke or comment rising through the monotone babble of chatter. You couldn't tell them apart, aside from the markings on their armour and the slight differences in voice, but they seemed like a family rather than the same person multiplied. You smiled as you watched them, until Obi-Wan tugged at your sleeve,

"Come on, I believe I promised you a proper breakfast this morning."

~~~~~~~~

Mos Eisley was not a settlement you expected to find a good restaurant in. Though, to be fair, it would take a lot to be worse than the greasy little shacks you often frequented in Coruscant. 

Everywhere was just waking up, stirring in the sunlight and dusting off the sand that hand be blown around during the night. People from all over were opening up shop, yelling to the animals and each other in their many native tongues. You found it calming, the hustle and bustle was not frightening in the least, if anything this was exactly the sort of place you would like to live- dry and constantly alive, not damp and dead like the alleys of your home planet.

Obi-Wan saw it differently. He made sure you stayed close to him, warning you of the dangerous Hutts who controlled the planet and telling stories of the sorts of people who often visited a place like this. Bounties and Bounty-Hunters, common thieves, murderers, anyone who wouldn't want to be found would find refuge in Mos Eisley. That didn't bother you much, but you weren't going to argue with him, so you agreed not to wander off, even going as far as to hold his hand when the thicket of people walking past you grew too thick for Obi-Wan's liking.

His hand was clamped tight around yours, but the silent connection was just as warm as the suns. Strong and sturdy, his hand held yours, leading you through the growing amount of people, weaving through dusty street after dusty street. He was almost reluctant to let go when you no longer needed his guidance, his hand letting go of yours slowly, his fingers brushing as much skin as possible before finally breaking away and falling to his side. You thought nothing of it, more worried about how sweaty your palm had become, wandering whether he had noticed or not. 

You eventually stepped through the entrance to a small cantina. Music was playing quietly, a happy tune that would certainly get stuck in your head for weeks on end, and you saw that there were yet to be many patrons. Obi-Wan led you to a table in the back, a semi-circle shaped booth that was secluded by walls on three sides. You slid in, watching as a Obi-Wan did the same, careful not to shuffle to far over, leaving as much space as possible between you. 

A twi-lek came over with drinks that you didn't even order, just placing down the tray with a smile and wink in Obi-Wan's direction, which he ignored. He poured you both a glass of the stuff, and you drank, humming when the red liquid burned with the familiar sensation of alcohol. Neither of you had drunk for a while, and you could tell Obi-Wan was just as pleased as you were. He set down the glass, eyeing you up from across the booth,

"What would you like to eat?"

"I don't know, what do you recommend?"

"I hear the Jawas are very called of what they call 'sooga'."Obi-Wan glanced over to the small gathering of Jawas who were pestering the twi-lek

"What's 'sooga'?" You asked, eyes fixed on them as they reached out greedily and tried to remove the twi-leks necklace from around their neck.

"Egg by the looks of it," Obi-Wan nodded over in the Jawas' direction. The twi-lek had handed them a large egg which they smashed open and ate raw with their hands. You scrunched up your nose.

"Maybe not,"

Obi-Wan nodded. The Jawas were scraping the egg-shell clean in a desperate attempt to get out as much slimy stuff as they could, shovelling it into the dark abyss where their faces were supposed to be. You turned away and distracted yourself with another sip of your drink.

~~~~~~~~

Instead of 'sooga', the twi-lek recommended a range of foods on a platter. You didn't expect much, but you were pleasantly surprised. It was mostly fruit, brightly coloured and almost too sweet to be eating this early, but there was meat too. The meat of what exactly, neither of you were sure, but it tasted rich and smoky, kind of like an enhanced taste of the very air around you.

Obi-Wan was more reserved while eating, picking at what you didn't like instead of taking what he really wanted. He was holding back, not because he was concerned about cost, but because you seemed so happy. The meal was yours, he knew that, and he wasn't going to put a damper on it by asking you to refrain. It was a test of endurance for him, seeing how far he could go before snapping. He had held your hand while you walked, which he shouldn't have done and now he was punishing himself. Your hand was small and dainty in comparison to his, smooth and soft- too soft, and he couldn't help but want to hold it again. He had _made_ himself sit on the edge of the booth, not trusting himself to sit beside you. Lately, it was becoming harder and harder to stop himself- he had to be near you, had to be touching you in some way, even if it was something as small as your leg pressed against his. _Anything_ was enough to make him hot beneath the collar and he _hated_ it.

When did this obsession begin? He believed it started after he found you locked away in a room, so scared and alone, he had vowed to never make you feel that way again. From there, it had only gotten worse: the prolonged amount of time the two of shared together was causing his affections to grow and strengthen, worsening every time he saw you. Those afternoons you spent in the library? They were blissful torture, so sweet and yet pained as he reminded himself that he could never truly have you.

He was sworn to the Jedi council, and you were sworn to a life that he had no connection to. You would leave once this mission was complete, then what would he do? Get over it? Mourn you like you were dead? The last time, he had-

-no, it was best that he didn't think about her. 

He picked at the food left on the platter as you sat back and bathed in the ever-growing heat of Tatooine. You seemed so at home here, he hated seeing you in the humid depths, slick and slimy- not like you. You were warm, and your humour almost dry, much like the very planet you were currently on. It was built for you, the whole galaxy seemed to be. It was _made_ for _you_ to explore, everything was. Except for Obi-Wan, he was not made for you, _you_ were made for _him. So perfect,_ he thought, so different to him and yet so _perfect_.


	15. 15- The possibilities that come with dreaming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's quite the journey to be made from Mos Eisley to where you need to be

Obi-Wan escorted you back to the camp. You tried to grab his arm again, but he stepped away, almost too forcefully. He was still exercising some restraint, leaving you a few steps behind to make your own way through the crowds as he walked ahead. He pulled at his robes, cooling himself off slightly, glancing behind himself to look at you. You hurried to catch up with him, 

"General Obi-Wan, what are we doing now?"

"Going back to the clones, we've got to start moving soon." He removed his brown cloak and draped it over his shoulder,

"Where are we going again?"

"A little way past here, the Separatists have a base set up disguised as a moisture farm."

"Why would they set up a base all the way out here?" You asked,

Obi-Wan frowned, "That's what worries me, there is no reason. They're planning something, they must be." He placed a hand on your shoulder, "Come on, they'll be missing us soon."

You joined the clones at camp. They were preparing the supplies from their ships for travel, loading them onto their backs and onto the backs of animals. You offered to help, but they turned you down, already almost finished with their tasks. Instead, you moved on from watching them to assist Obi-Wan with your own duties, packing your own bag of things (mainly weapons, ropes, medical supplies, water and more packets of that horrendous food).

"Why don't we just fly the ships over to the base?" You asked, huffing as you tried to cram a med-kit into your bag.

"Because," replied Obi-Wan, leaning over to help you, removing your items and replacing them neatly, leaving room, "We don't want them to spot us. It's quieter to move on foot,"

"And harder,"

"Having doubts?" Obi-Wan was smirking,

"No, I just don't want to catch heat stroke." You snatched up your bag, Obi-Wan quickly followed you as you met back up with clones.

It was approaching midday and the suns were at their peaks. You thought maybe they would decide to wait until after this had passed, but they didn't. The clones were anxious to get moving, and you wondered how they weren't dying in their armour. Perhaps they were, but they didn't say anything.

You stayed by Obi-Wan's side, at the back of the group, making small talk and you navigated the dangerous, hot plains and dunes. You passed by a family of Jawas, eagerly selling some droids to a couple of farmers, and laughed when they approached you, trying to steal the clones armour and blasters. Obi-Wan shooed them away, urging you on through you giggles.

He kept his cloak off for the journey, but you could tell he was still roasting in his robes. Did the Jedi not know of weather-appropriate clothing? You didn't say anything, there were probably rules about modesty in the Jedi Order, or just rules about clothing in general. You watched as Obi-Wan's hair lost its shape, melting and sticking to his forehead limply. That was amusing, checking up every minute or so to see the progress that had been made. With each minute that passed, Obi-Wan became less and less concerned with trying to maintain his hair's composure, giving in to the heat and letting it do as it wanted. 

Eventually, you actually began to worry. You were nearly half way there and Obi-Wan did not look good. He was drenched, his face redder than an evening sky, his breathe coming out in pants like some sort of dog.

"Are you ok, General Obi-Wan?"

"Not really," He admitted, taking a bottle of water and splashing himself with it before swiftly downing the rest.

"Why don't you take off some of your robes?" You asked, pointing at the thick material,

He sighed before stopping his movements. You did the same, turning to see the clones had not noticed and were still marching onwards. You didn't stop them, they couldn't go far.

Obi-Wan started with his belt, removing it and handing it to you to hold. You felt a little embarrassed, watching him undress like this, but you'd feel worse if he passed out from the heat. You looked away shyly, staring at the sand instead of him.

He then removed his outer layers before tapping you on the shoulder. You looked up, expecting to see his bare chest, but instead you were met with a simple, white undershirt. He nodded to the belt, and you handed it to him. He put away his clothes in his bag and smiled at you.

"That's better, come on, we'll have to hurry to catch up with the others."

You nodded, and the two of you jogged after the clones, seeing they had made greater progress than expected, and were already over the first of the great dunes in your path. Obi-Wan took your hand and helped you climb the slope, feet sliding and sinking in the sand; sand in your eyes, your hair, your mouth. You spat out what you could when you reached the top, only for Obi-Wan to laugh at you,

"It'll be worse going down," He says, before grasping your hand again. He was starting to feel the buzz of adrenaline he always got on missions, and his grip on his Morales was starting to slip. 

He ran down the hill, dragging you behind, and the two of you practically rolled down the sand dune. Neither of you could stay completely upright, and before long you were more sliding than running, holding onto each other in a desperate attempt to stay on your feet. You couldn't stop laughing the whole way down, body trembling as Obi-Wan held you tight, your laughter causing you to lose your grip on his hand. It was nice, the two of you, sharing a moment like this. Nobody was around for miles, except the clones, but they were too concerned with their mission to pay you any mind. You could be together with him in moments like this, because of course you didn't know about the rules, the way attachment was forbidden. It was moments like these that Obi-Wan forgot that too, but he was always reminded eventually, and it always stung just as painfully. 

The two of you could never be like this, not really. 

These moments were glimpses at a possibility, like looking into another universe where such things were possible. But soon Obi-Wan would remember who he was, who he had sworn to be, and that possibility would be snatched away from him.

Soon, he would wake from this magnificent dream and have to face reality. 


	16. 16- Mission... accomplished?

Approaching the base, you saw it was very much similar to a moisture farm. The outside made it seem small, insignificant, but as you approached, you spotted droids patrolling the area and four towers at each corner of the land. It was an eyesore compared to the rugged beauty of the sand, but you still wanted to run off and explore it, snoop around and familiarise yourself with the new _thing_ before you.

Obi-Wan was less eager, holding your shoulder tight to prevent you from running off and commanding the clones to get a closer look. They did so, splitting off and circling the base, wary of how far the droids could see ahead of them and staying out of sight. Obi-Wan stayed close, but encouraged the two of you to go closer as well,

"There should only be droids inside, they'd never waste a general on something like this."

You nodded, wiping sand from your face as Obi-Wan received a message from a clone, Cody, he called him.

"Sir, we found a back entrance. There's only a few guards."

"Good, wait there, we'll be with you shortly." Obi-Wan turned to you and flashed a devilish, excited smile, "This is where the fun begins."

~~~~~~~~

It was a blur, really, from the moment Cody shot the first droid to standing in the main hub of the base. You remembered orders being yelled, bolsters being fired, Obi-Wan dragging you along when you were too overwhelmed to just follow behind. The clones were talented, incredibly so, and you began to trust them a lot more. They worked in sync, perfect harmony as they cleared the base of droids. 

A few had gone off to search the base for any survivors, and you were left with the others and Obi-Wan in the hub. It was weird, standing in a Separatist base, it was almost identical to the interfaces in the Jedi Temple and on the ships; the same buttons and switches, just used for different things. You ran your hand along a panel and imagined what it would have been like for the droids, alone, on a planet nobody visited, working tirelessly with no free will. You locked eyes with a clone who had removed their helmet and realised, with great regret, that the clones were maybe less free than even the droids. The droids were simply that, machines, but the clones were alive. One had died during your break-in, and they had bled like you would have. They died with ragged breathes, like you. They had cried like you.

You looked away from the clones and back to Obi-Wan, who was fiddling with the panels,

"let's see if we can't find out why this is here, then." He said, bringing up a hologram that displayed the base in its entirety. The picture flickered and moved, zooming on certain sections that Obi-Wan selected with the panel.

To say you understood what you were seeing would be a lie, you were none the wiser, but you were enjoying the adventure. The base had many more floors than you anticipated, going down and down below the sand. It didn't even look finished, with the lowest floor leading to the beginning of another. Obi-Wan sighed and tried to find some sort of log or report to show what exactly they had been doing.

"It can't just be a surveillance base. There's too many floors, it's too big, no surveillance base is this big." He muttered to himself as he continued to sort through the mass of files, picking it clean for information. 

The other clones came back from the search, reporting that a few droids had been found on the lowest level, desperately trying to open a door. You thought nothing of it, droids weren't intelligent, they were probably just looking for an exit. Instead, you watched Obi-Wan grow more and more frustrated with his lack of success.

"At least we stopped them," You said, trying to cheer him up.

"No, that's not enough. There's something more happening here, I can sense it." He pressed a few more buttons, before saying, "Here! Call recordings! every communication from this base has been logged!" He played one, the most recent message and stepped back.

A droid appeared in hologram form, talking to somebody that you couldn't see,

"Sir, the base is almost complete. Soon we will be ready for you."

There was silence for a moment, before a raspy and robotic voice replied,

"Excellent, I'll prepare my ship, I expect you'll be finished by the time I arrive."

The droid didn't even get to respond before Obi-Wan shut off the recording hurriedly.

"General Grievous." He said, 

"The evil separatist general robot guy?" You stepped up to the panel and met Obi-Wan's shocked face. Admittedly, you weren't up to date with all of the happenings, but you'd picked up the name 'Grievous' during your time with the Jedi.

"He was planning to visit the base, the message was sent a couple weeks ago. This is the most recent call, which means-"

"What? You think he's still here."

"Yes." Obi-Wan, clearly stressed, fixed his hair and sighed, "I should of sensed him, but I was too worried about the mission." He strolled past you and the clones and headed for the door,

"General, where are you going?" You asked,

"To find Grievous, stay here." 

~~~~~~~~

Obi-Wan ran down the stairs as fast as he could manage. They were currently on the highest floor with no sign of the general, and the clones hadn't reported anything bar a few droids. They had been on the lowest level, trying to get through a door. Maybe that's where Grievous was hiding? Far below the ground past a door not even his own soldiers could pass through. It would make sense, he thought, passing yet another floor as he continued his descent.

As he got lower down, the air grew mustier and damper, cold started seeping in, as did the moisture from the soil encasing the building. He stopped to put back on the robes he had removed and grimaced when the hand he was using to hold the stair railing made contact with a growing patch of moss. 

It reminded him a lot of the depths of Coruscant, all dirty and decaying. Of course, he was reluctant to think about the place, because it made him think of you. Out of the darkness, a light had been born- from the murky depths, a beauty had emerged. It was magic, unadulterated magic that led to your birth, your amazing ability to power through the grime and come out sparkling. He felt a flush creep up his neck and tried to control his thoughts, but he was powerless. You consumed more and more each day, no wonder he had been unable to sense Grievous, he was solely fixated on you. If only he could have you, if only for a day, and then he could feed his undeniable hunger and stomp it out for good. 

That was impossible though, nobody in the Jedi order would ever dare do such a thing as break the code. It was written in ink and set in stone forever- attachment is forbidden. He had thought of such things before, and they had left him in pain, unable to breathe, suffocating while trying to suffocate his feelings. 

He knew better than to disobey the code, and he was determined to stop himself before things got out of hand, but you made it so _difficult._ You were too good, too beautiful, too charming and witty and kind. All the things that should make you desirable, and yet he was forbidden to even form an attachment to you. That was too late, of course, but as long as there was no physical evidence of the two of you, he could deny everything.

That's all he needed to do, deny everything and assure there was no way of anyone discovering how he felt.

Back to his actual objective, however, he was making some progress. He reached the bottom of the long spiral of stairs and wandered down a hallway that led to a single door. It was locked, with no window to peer inside with. Listening carefully, he heard a few loud steps followed by a cough that came from a little way behind the door. It was definitely Grievous, and Obi-Wan grew anxious to confront him.

Igniting his lightsaber, Obi-Wan plunged it through the door, the metal melting and glowing red as the door fell apart around his blade. He stepped inside, and heard the metal clacking of Grievous,

"Who is it?" coughed out the general, emerging from the shadows of the seemingly empty room,

"General Grievous, I've waited for this day."

"General Kenobi, so have I..." 

Grievous turned from inside the dark, entering the light emitting from Obi-Wan's lightsaber and tilting his head like a wolf that had spotted it's prey. Obi-Wan swallowed thickly and remembered that you were waiting for him upstairs. He had to win. He had to.

"You have discovered my base, but I'm afraid the battle is not yet won." Grievous took out two sabres of his own and spun them in such a way as to initiate battle. Obi-Wan understood perfectly and assumed position, steadying himself and breathing deeply.

"Then I will win it." He says, faking confidence that he did not have. 

Grievous lunged forward and Obi-Wan was quick to block him, although the sudden attack made him stumble backwards slightly. He tried to put himself on the offence, but Grievous' two sabres gave him the advantage, as he blocked Obi-Wan with one and attacked with the other. If it weren't for Obi-Wan's training, he wouldn't stand a chance, but somehow he managed to keep up, even if he was slightly slower. 

Something was clouding his mind, but he didn't know what. Usually, he could almost see what movement would come next, but something was preventing him from doing so. Was it just the surprise? The nerves? No, no it was something else. He could see something, far off in the distance, just out of reach, not impossibly far away but moving farther with each moment. A figure, a female one, stood in the sand, hair wildly astray and a bright smile that lit up his heart.

It was you.

Obi-Wan gasped, the hissed when the heat of Grievous' sabre slashed into his side. He fell, clutching at his wound, feeling tears sting his eyes. He ended up on his knees, curled into a ball, eyes screwed shut. You vanished from view, and he was equal parts thankful and confused for that. What _were_ you doing to him?

He looked up, Grievous was poised over him, both blades raised, ready to kill. He bowed his head again and accepted what came next, he pictured you in his mind and whispered a silent goodbye. If he were to die, he wanted you to be the last thing he saw in his mind, the last thing he thought about- he wanted his last words to be 

"Y/N, I- I lov-" 

"OBI-WAN!"

~~~~~~~~

The blaster in your hand seemed to fire without you doing anything. You weren't thinking straight, firing at the metal monster before you without any concern or hesitation. Cody and several clones stood behind you, you thought maybe they were calling out to you, but your heart was pounding too loud to hear them. Obi-Wan looked so fragile, knelt down and hunched over as if he were praying. You had heard him muttering something before you cried out, but you couldn't make out what.

You were acting out of pure adrenaline, firing yet more shots from the blaster you had prised from Cody's hands just moments ago. You had never shot anyone before, but it felt right, what you were doing. Grievous growled and suddenly more limbs appeared from seemingly nowhere. He scuttled onto the ceiling and over your heads, up the stairs and disappearing from view. The clones started shooting after him, but you were more concerned with Obi-Wan. You ran to him, falling to your knees and lifting his head.

"Are you ok Obi-Wan? Are you hurt?"

He groaned and you noticed he was grabbing his side. Removing his hands, you saw a nasty gash, burning through his clothes and showing the blood and muscle underneath. You were crying now, seeing him injured pained you just as much, and you buried your face into his neck, sobbing openly and pulling him as close as you could.

"Y/N... Y/N... You have to go after Grievous..." He sucked in a breath, "He can't get away..."

"I don't care about Grievous, I need to know that you're safe."

"I'm fine, please..."

"Master Obi-Wan, I won't leave you." You pulled away to look him in the eyes, sparkling, glistening with tears. Your face felt hot, as hot as the burn he had been given. 

"Very well. But the council won't be happy."

"I don't care about the council, Obi-Wan I can't lose you."

He smiled and suddenly you realised how desperately you wanted to kiss him. He must have felt the same, his face inching closer to yours, head tilted to prepare for the collision. You closed your eyes, trusting he would continue what he was doing , but you were interrupted by the arrival of the medic who pulled you away forcefully. You looked to Obi-Wan and saw disappointment flash across his face, followed by realisation of what he had been doing.

Was he ashamed? Did he not want this? 


	17. 17- The 'l' word

Obi-Wan was lying on his bed in the Jedi temple. After being treated by the medic on Tatooine, there was no delay in exporting him to the ship and flying back to Coruscant for his recovery. You stayed by him the entire time, never leaving the room, let alone the temple, just in case he needed anything. He slept a lot, not the whole time, but enough that it gave you time to think.

You mostly thought about him; you were worried, and nervous and incredibly confused about what would happen to him. Obi-Wan did not seem the sort to surrender and accept defeat, they did not seem the sort to allow that happen. He was brave, and he would not take any loss that a person handed to him, so why had he done that? Why had he knelt before Grievous like a martyr, a sacrifice? What had he muttered seconds before you came in? Why had he almost kissed you?

That was what you thought about most of all.

It wasn't like you didn't like it, but more so that you didn't want it to stop. Days went by where that was all that crossed your mind. You would sit on the sofa all day, watching the man before you and picturing on his knees, centimetres away from touching you, his breathe raising goosebumps on you flesh, raising it as it almost keened to touch him. You would spend hours in the shower, lost in thought, not noticing or feeling the water running down your face, invading your eyes and burning when you left it on one spot for too long. Nothing else mattered except for Obi-Wan, your brain simply couldn't comprehend anything else.

Others came to visit him, mainly Anakin, who would enter silently without warning and leave just as suddenly. His first visit startled you, and although Obi-Wan was asleep, therefore unable to protect you, you still shifted closer to him to ensure your safety. Anakin nodded to acknowledge you and stood by the end of his bed.

"I'm sorry I wasn't able to protect you. I should have been there." His voice had a new-found determination, one you hadn't heard before. "If only I was there, you'd be ok."

"I was there. I saved him."

Anakin didn't reply, only grabbed the end of the bedsheets in tight fists and ground his teeth slightly. He was angry. "I'm strong enough to protect you Obi-Wan."

"You care about him a lot, don't you?" You stepped closer, gently pulling one of Anakin's hands away from the bed

"He's my old master, he's like a brother." He looked away, "You wouldn't understand."

"No, I wouldn't." You shrugged, "But I care about him too."

"Have you told him?" Anakin asked, letting go of the sheets and lowering his voice

"No, I- I haven't." It didn't feel right, talking about what happened. 

"Good, I know he cares about you as well, Y/N, even if he doesn't say it."

You looked to the sleeping man, peaceful and silent. His aura of strength and courage pulsed, almost as if it recognised that you were staring. You could almost see the force surrounding him, tough and impenetrable. That hadn't been there when he knelt down and almost let Grievous kill him- why? 

"Anyway," Anakin cleared his throat, "I need to go and see Padme, tell Obi-Wan I came by if he wakes up."

You nodded, "I will."

All his other visits went similarly. The two of you had not bonded over anything other than that one experience, so you had nothing to say to each other. Not that you minded, though. From what you could tell, Anakin was quite the hot-head, irritable, impulsive and unforgiving to those who wronged him. How he and Obi-Wan became such close friends was a mystery, they seemed polar opposites. No other Jedi was quite like Anakin, at least you were yet to meet one.

Kit stopped by as well, but not for Obi-Wan. Instead, he came by to check on you. You only ever ate late at night or early morning, when you were sure Obi-Wan would sleep through your absence, but Kit often brought snacks or a tray of drinks that he would set atop the small table for you.

"I heard you were the one to save Master Kenobi," He smiles, pouring two cups of sweet, floral-smelling tea, "It's quite impressive."

"Grievous got away, though, I didn't exactly save the day."

"You saved Obi-Wan's life, that is surely enough?" He handed you a cup, which you accepted gratefully. You hadn't slept, the warm, comforting liquid soothed your aching eyes.

"Maybe you're right, I just- he doesn't look 'saved'." You shrugged and sipped cautiously on your tea, not wanting to burn yourself. It was heavenly, rose in colour, almost see-through and it was exactly what you needed right now.

"He's healing, he needs time." Kit almost drank his tea, "I sense you feel a lot for Master Kenobi."

"What do you mean by that?"

"You have a lot of feelings, but I cannot tell what exactly, maybe you could enlighten me?"

You shook your head, "I don't know anymore than you, I care about him- I want him to be ok- that's it."

Kit simply drank more tea, not talking or smiling or nodding to indicate that he understood. You copied him and the conversation seemed over. 

"You know, there are several definitions for the word love, it doesn't have to be romantic." Kit smiled and swirled the liquid in his cup, "If I was to try and pinpoint your feelings, I'd say it was love."

You pretended not to hear him, instead focusing on the rising and falling of Obi-Wan's chest, feeling your own contract with nerves. Did you love him? Really? You easily could, you thought- Obi-Wan was not a difficult person to love in the slightest.

He was conventionally attractive, charming with the slightest inkling of impulsiveness. Witty, funny, he had a way of making you feel special.

You had never felt like this about anyone- was it love? You wouldn't know. How could you recognise a feeling you'd never felt? 

It was at this point that you finally snapped back to your senses. Kit had left, you weren't sure how long ago that was. Obi-Wan was awake, sat up slightly and looking at you with the most peculiar expression.

"What are you thinking about?"

"Nothing- nothing important."


	18. 18- The other 'l' word

  
Eventually, he got better. Slowly, he managed to sit and talk and stay awake for longer. You spent every minute with him, eager for him to recover so you could finally, finally, return to normal. It's been so difficult without him, in ways you couldn't fathom before you had them ripped away from you.

Before, you had spent your time with him, especially inside the temple, where the people were unfamiliar and the corridors were all too similar. Evenings were spent drinking tea and silently reading books, only speaking to comment on the stories you were reading. Obi-Wan would often get carried away with his stories, and you wouldn't return to your room until night had long since fallen. He would shower, steam flooding from the refresher door when he returned, fogging up the room as he retired to his sofa and bid you goodnight.

You still didn't sleep too well, so you would instead lay there, while the steam dissipated, watching the rise and fall of his chest and wishing _so desperately_ that you could be laying with him. His arms around you, chest rising and touching against your back as you curled up and allowed yourself to finally feel safe.

However, your dreams were yet to come true. Even after his recovery was relatively complete, he still seemed distant from you- more so than usual. He took his meals separately , and spent much of his time in the communication room, which you were banned from entering unless specifically requested. You spent your time in your room now, alone. Clinging to the scent of him in the bed, which had grown stronger from the prolonged time he had spent in there. You didn't sleep, only laid there. Wishing and wanting for him to return and finally give you everything you wanted.

Eventually, dreaming wasn't enough. You craved something more, something to do that wasn't just moping about. You wandered if there wasn't anything in the room that could provide you with some answers, something that you could use to calm your mind and satisfy your desperate need for him. You looked under the bed, finding nothing more than a little dust and a few books that looked worn and forgotten. Upon opening them, you saw they were borrowed from the library and severely overdue. You put them back and crawled back out from underneath the bed, coughing slightly.

Then you checked the wardrobe, pulling it open and finding nothing more than robes. All cream and plain and exactly the same as the ones he wore. On the bottom of the wardrobe in a bag were the secondhand robes you had bought together in the depths. You smiled, not knowing that he would've kept them. The bag looked out of place in the formal, exact line of clothing. Leaving it where it sat, you sifted through the robes, feeling the fabric greedily, imagining his warmth beneath them. After the robes were the cloaks, once again brown and identical.

That was it really, however the last two cloaks were slightly different, almost unnoticeable. One was smaller than the rest, not by a lot but enough to show that it wasn't Obi-Wan's. The next was bigger, and a few shades darker. You picked the two of them out, feeling the aged, stiff fabric that had clearly gone unwashed and unloved for years now. You sat on the floor, with the cloaks on your lap, wandering who these belonged to, and why they now sat in Obi-Wan's wardrobe. Were they his? Were they someone else's? Why were they here?

~~~~~~~~

After what may have been minutes or may have been hours, Obi-Wan entered the room and found you silently sat there, with two cloaks in your arms. He recognised them immediately and snatched them away from  
you without hesitation, chest tight as he tried to shove them back into his wardrobe.

"Master Obi-Wan?"

"Don't touch those!" He says, failing to put the garments away, they slip from his anxious grasp and fall back onto your lap.

He falls to his knees, clutching at the fabric and watching your face grow more and more confused.

"I'm sorry Master Obi-Wan, did I do something wrong?"

"These aren't yours, why do you have them?" He's still holding the cloaks, but his grip is weaker.

"I-I was just looking-" You looked away, "I'm sorry."

He didn't say anything, just lifted the cloaks to his chest and cradled them.

"Are they yours?"

"The smaller one is, the other one is Qui-Gon's"

"Your old master? He must have been tall."

Obi-Wan smiled , "He was."

"Tell me about him."

Obi-Wan hesitated, eyes distant as if they weren't from this time. He didn't look at you, instead looking down at the cloaks and running his hands over them.

"Jedi are taken in from a very early age. I barely remember my parents, but I remember Qui-Gon. He was like a father to me, he was the closest thing I had to family."

"What was he like?"

"He was brave, and wise, he was everything i aspire to be. When we found Anakin on Tatooine, he wad the one who decided to take him in. I wanted to leave him, but Qui-Gon didn't. Every-time I see Anakin, I remember how I wanted to abandon him."

He pauses for a moment, shifting closer towards you, allowing you to snuggle against his form, "I'm glad I didn't in the end, Anakin and I are like family. Of course, for that to happen Qui-Gon made his dying wish for me to train him."

"I didn't want to, but he was lying there, and I couldn't say no to him. I was so angry, and devastated- Qui-Gon didn't even say anything about me as he died, he could only talk about Anakin; Anakin was the last thing he thought about- not me."

"I'm sure he thinks about you in death," You looked up, red pulled at Obi-Wan's cheeks, splotchy and raw. Tears were streaming down his face, hands gripping at the fabric like he was going to tear them apart. 

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't be telling you all this, it's much too depressing."

"I want to hear. How did you deal with it, then?"

"I trained Anakin, I had to."

"That's it? What about grieving?"

"There wasn't time. We held his funeral and then we moved on, there wasn't time to stop and mourn him, grieving is ultimately pointless."

"You never cried for him? Mourned his life? Celebrated all that he did?"

"The Jedi Council were too busy. Y/N, I don't think you realise-"

"No, I think it's you that doesn't realise. He was your friend, who cares what the council says? You have every right to be sad."

"He was more than a friend- he was a father to me. They take padawans at a very early age, I barely remember my parents, I grew up with masters instead."

You shifted closer, feeling the roughness of his beard scratching at your temple. He dropped the cloaks to hold you instead, letting them pool to the floor as his arms wound around you tightly.

"Cry now, Obi-Wan. I know you are already, it's alright, everything will be alright."

He didn't say anything, only rested his head on yours and muffled his broken sobs with your body. The hands holding you trembled, the voice you had heard laugh so often could do nothing more than sputter out desperate pleas. You cried with him, feeling the warmth of his body, the vibrations from his sobs echoing through you like waves in a pond.

"Obi-Wan, there's something I need to tell you..."

"Shhh, it's ok, it can wait."

"No, Obi-Wan, it can't."

He sniffed, "What is it?"

"I- I... I lo-" 

"No, no, Y/N, don't say that"

"Say what?"

"What you were going to say. Don't say it to make me feel better, say it later- when you truly mean it. When no other words can be spoken, say it then."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for the late update everyone! I hope you can forgive me for letting you down xx


	19. 19- A snippet of life

Obi-Wan told you stories all night. You moved from the floor to the bed after some time, as he told you tales in the comforting dark. In the dark, he could pretend that what he was doing was ok, even if he knew that it wasn't. With each word, he grew closer to you, each syllable served to solidify how he felt about you. He didn't say anything, only wondered if you could feel it too, the change in atmosphere. It grew from deathly and cold to warm and inviting. Maybe that was from your body heat as you sat together on his bed, but either way it was heavenly and calming. Obi-Wan felt his troubles ease when he was with you, so much so that even his worries about his feelings didn't matter in that moment. He felt so warm, like there was a fire burning away inside of him, flames spreading deliciously along his limbs and into his head, making his delightfully dizzy. 

Everything, right then, was perfect.

~~~~~~~~

You don't remember falling asleep, but you did wake up. Your head was on Obi-Wan's lap, who was sleeping peacefully- sat up, leaning back against the wall. You must have dozed off while he was talking, and you didn't think much of it until you felt his hand intwined with your hair. He had been petting it, his fingers still positioned, ready to begin again at a moment's notice. You carefully sat up, not wanting to disturb him. You smiled at him, before getting up to shower.

He still wasn't awake by breakfast, so you went alone. By now, you knew the way well, and you were starting to appreciate the identical corridors a little more. They were familiar now, they were home. 

The canteen was already full of Jedi, all trying to find a spot to eat. You sat down with Master Fisto, who was enjoying hot tea with Anakin and Master Windu. 

"Is Master Kenobi still asleep?" Kit asked, offering you tea,

You nodded, "Yes, he's still not completely well, but he's got most of his strength back."

"His encounter with Grievous was a minor setback," said Windu, "You can't let it distract you from your next mission?"

"My next mission, Master? I thought that was a one-off?"

"You showed great courage when dealing with General Grievous, and where you're going, we'd need someone with your expertise."

Anakin hummed in agreement, "We're going to the depths."

"We're? Im sorry, I'm a little lost..."

"You, me, and Obi-Wan." Anakin smiled, "We're going undercover."

You wanted to groan, but stopped yourself. A mission with Anakin did not sound enjoyable, nor did going back to where you had come from. You had secretly vowed to never return to that retched place, not after the magical things you had seen. You'd find work on a higher level, maybe something in politics, live the lavish life others did. You wanted to make a better life for yourself, and if you were lucky, a better life for others in the depths too. That place was behind you now, it was in the past, you didn't want to slip back into that foul, abhorrent lifestyle.

"Miss Y/N? You will accompany Skywalker and Kenobi, won't you?"

"If I must, Master Windu." 

You finished your tea and ate your breakfast as quick as you could, if it weren't for the eyes on you, your face would have been very different. You could already feel the grime of the streets, the burning scent of vomit and alcohol was invading your nostrils. Liquor sat heavy on your tongue, even if your were only drinking sweet, fragrant tea. It was like you were travelling back in time, switching back to your life before the Jedi, before Obi-Wan.


	20. 20- Two halves of the same person

Obi-Wan awoke some time after you had left for the canteen. He could still feel your warmth around him, and he was reluctant to get up, disturb the air floating around, the only thing left of you. So he stayed there, sitting in his bed, as he waited for your return. 

"Master Obi-Wan?" You knocked before opening the door, he smiled, rubbing the sleep from his eyes,

"y/n, where did you run off to?"

"Breakfast, I brought you some." You sat on the end of the bed and handed him the tray, which he picked at as you talked, 

"We're going away, Master Windu is sending me, you, and Anakin to the depths."

Obi-Wan hummed, "Don't you think it's a little soon? I've only just recovered."

"That's what I thought, but Master Windu insists."  
  


"Then we must go," Obi-Wan set the tray down on his nightstand and got up, disappearing into the bathroom. 

When he emerged again, he was quick to hurry you out into the corridors, "It's been a while since I've showed my face around here, it'll be nice to see everyone again."

The Jedi were please to see Obi-Wan, wishing him well as the two of you walked together. Everyone seemed so excited to see him again, you almost felt invisible as they spoke to him but ignored you. You supposed that was selfish, he'd been in bed recovering for so long, it was understandable for people to want to see him again. Still, you couldn't help it, wishing to reach your destination sooner rather than later.

Obi-Wan pushed open the door to the communications room. Silence fell, and you saw that Anakin, Master Windu and Yoda were all looking at you. Anakin stopped whatever he was doing and hurried over to Obi-Wan,  
  


"I've missed you, Obi-Wan." He pulled him into a tight hug, which Obi-Wan didn't return. Instead he laughed and patted Anakin on the back to get him to pull away,  
  


"It's always good to be missed, I suppose." He smiled down at you, "But I heard we've got a new mission."  
  


Master Windu nodded, and suddenly the table lit up, displaying the depths of Coruscant that you knew so well. The alleys and back streets you lived to walk. You looked them over and imagined yourself strolling down them. If you had never met Obi-Wan, would you be walking down one right now? Drunk and covered in filth- stumbling probably- finding your way home in the dark and the fog.   
  


"Separatists have infiltrated the depths, reports of rebellion are spreading. Apparently, they are trying to recruit the poor in the hopes of their numbers shifting the tide in Coruscant." He looked at Anakin, Obi-Wan and yourself, "You will be going undercover in order to find whoever's responsible and get rid of them. We cannot allow Coruscant to fall into enemy hands." 

You watched the hologram disappear. Rebellion? Obi-Wan placed a hand on your shoulder, and shifted closer to him. Undercover in the depths sounded like torture, especially with Obi-Wan and Anakin by your side. Anakin huffed and shrugged his shoulders,  
  


"I don't see the point in worrying, those scum will never be able to accomplish anything down there."  
  


You felt your cheeks burn with embarrassment. Those 'scum' were your friends, your neighbours, maybe even family. You weren't proud of where you came from, but they were people too. Nobody can control where they are born, and escaping the depths is not a privilege granted to many. It's not easy to claw your way out of that place, you were lucky to be found by the Jedi. Others were not that fortunate. 

Obi-Wan's grip on your shoulder tightened. He could sense how uncomfortable Anakin made you, and even if he could never understand exactly why the two of you had such a rocky relationship, he wanted you to sort it out. This mission would be just the three of you, and it would be a chance for you and Anakin to sort out your differences- at least that's what Obi-Wan thought. He cared about you both deeply, seeing that you didn't get along pained him. He hated having to choose between the two of you, if only you could all be friends. 

"Come along, Y/N, it's been so long since I last trained, I think it's well overdue." He led you out of the communications room, but you felt someone hold you back,  
  


"I'll come too, it has been too long, Obi-Wan." Anakin smiled at you, but his eyes looked dead. Obi-Wan didn't notice, only chuckled to himself,  
  


"Very well, Anakin, I believe Y/N is yet to see your skills in action." 

The three of you left together, Obi-Wan stood between Anakin and you, which you were grateful for. You didn't hate Anakin, but after what he did to you, you didn't trust him. Not only did he deceive you, he deceived and continues to deceive Obi-Wan. You kept your promise not to tell him, but were you doing the right thing? If only Obi-Wan knew, then maybe he wouldn't be so carelessly trusting of the young Jedi. As you walked alongside the two of them, you remembered what Obi-Wan told you,

_"Every time I see Anakin, I remember how I wanted to abandon him"_

It must be a lot of guilt to bare, you realised, looking at how Obi-Wan laughed at his jokes, listened to his every word. When Anakin was just a child, Obi-Wan planned to leave him behind. He must have had his reasons, but still. Anakin was just a boy, on a planet that had nothing compared to what Obi-Wan had on Coruscant. He was going to abandon Anakin, leave him in a place where he would never amount to anything. You looked at Anakin again and realised something you wished you hadn't-

-he was just like you. 

You, too, lived in a place where you would be never be anybody, never have your potential realised, never achieve your dreams no matter how much you tried. Is that what Obi-Wan thought when he looked at you that first night? That you were just like Anakin, lost and afraid and struggling against your very surroundings. Is that why he tried so hard to take you away from there? To make up for the time he wanted to leave Anakin? You felt your throat tighten and your chest lighten with those butterflies you always got when you thought about Obi-Wan too much. You almost wanted to cry, but then you were being led into the training room and both Anakin and Obi-Wan were removing their robes. You didn't have time to think about that anymore, not even when you looked at Anakin and saw yourself looking right back at you. 


	21. 21- Stupid Cliche

Before you could realise it, you, Obi-Wan and Anakin were travelling to the depths. You had travelled with Obi-Wan before, even wandered the depths with him. But Anakin didn't know that, so you both pretended that this was something new for you. You were all lugging around your bags, full of clothes, money as well as a bunch of technology that would help you track down whoever was causing this trouble. 

You stepped onto an elevator together, dropping like stones towards the depths. The air whooshed upwards, starting from pleasant, to freezing cold to the muggy warmth that you knew so well. It was sticky and hot in the depths, with thick fogs swirling patterns of green in the air. Anakin covered his nose as you walked, searching for a hotel to stay in. Obi-Wan was politer, though you couldn't exactly compliment the depths, he was nice enough so as to not make any negative comments. He glared at Anakin while you walked ahead, he knew this place meant a lot to you, even if it wasn't the nicest. You had lived here all your life, and by insulting it, Anakin was insulting you. He caught up to you and placed a protective hand on your shoulder. While it seemed a friendly gesture, Obi-Wan hoped you knew how much it meant for him. Just touching you was so exhilarating, especially with Anakin nearby. He couldn't know how close the two of you really were, even if you never spoke about it.

To Obi-Wan, it was like his body acted on its own. His desire to be with you, to touch you and care for you, it was so deep inside of him, buried beneath layers of guilt, that he couldn't even acknowledge what he wanted to do until he was already doing it. His voice failed him in these moments, he couldn't find the words, couldn't force himself to say them. A conscious decision to break the code, it would in turn shatter all of the years he had served the Jedi. 

That being said, there was always _her._

Eventually, you came across a shabby hotel on a street corner. Walking in, you were met with a dirty counter staffed by a strange looking person. In some parts of their mouth, they had too many teeth, in others their gums were bare. Their eyes were sunken and dark, glaring at you, even if they were smiling. 

"Three rooms please," Obi-Wan said, fishing around for his credits, 

"No can do, there's only two left. We're very busy."

"Really?" You asked, looking around.

"Yep, only hotel around. You're lucky there's any rooms at all."

You looked to Obi-Wan, who looked to Anakin. This _was_ the only hotel around, and two rooms were better than none. 

"It couldn't hurt," Anakin shrugged, "I don't mind sharing with you, Obi-Wan."

"Actually, I think it would be best if I shared with Y/N," Obi-Wan replied, you just caught the subtle redness on his cheeks, "She has all the knowledge on this place, and I have all the technology. It just.. That makes sense, right?"

You nodded, too nervous to speak. Obi-Wan's knuckles brushed against yours and you froze. Anakin shrugged again,

"Fine by me."

"We'll take those two rooms, then." Obi-Wan placed down his credits, "Thank you."

~~~~~~~~

You were expecting maybe two single beds, or at the very least a sofa in the room that one of you could sleep on. Sure, you had been staying in Obi-Wan's room your entire time at the temple, but you had never slept in the same bed. Except from that one time, but you didn't count that. You hadn't meant to fall asleep with him, it was a mistake.

This, however, was very, _very_ , deliberate. 

You put your bag down on the double bed and looked to Obi-Wan to say something. One bed, nothing else. Unless one of you was going to sleep on the filthy, strangely-damp floor, you were both going to be sleeping in the same bed. 

"Well, we could always sleep in shifts?" He suggested. You could tell by his voice he didn't believe himself

"We've been walking all day, Obi-Wan. It can't hurt." You laughed, "Better you and me than you and Anakin."

He laughed along, setting his own bag down. It was getting late, and you were both tired. Obi-Wan found some food in his pack and you shared it, sitting on the bed as you both picked at the cold, mushy substance. It was like the stuff you had to eat on Tatooine, but at least that was followed up the next day by a decent breakfast.

"Do you know any nice restaurants around here?" Obi-Wan offered, you shook your head,

"I'm not even sure where 'here' is. I think it's familiar but I'm not sure. Besides, I don't think nice restaurants exist this far down."

You finished eating, and Obi-Wan prepared for bed. The water in the bathroom would probably only serve to make you dirtier, so you both skipped on showering. Instead, you took turns changing in the bathroom. Obi-Wan climbed awkwardly into bed. Now that you were actually thinking about getting into bed with him, you felt embarrassed. However, you didn't have a choice. Obi-Wan was as far over as he could get, dangerously close to falling off the edge. You did the same, but even then the gap between the two of you wasn't very big. You sighed,

"This isn't how I expected our mission to go."

"Agreed, but let's just try and sleep. Whats the worse that can happen?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry, I'm a sucker for the 'there's only one bed' cliche. I actually wrote a similar thing in my Kylo Ren story, but I thought the awkwardness with these two would be through the roof and that's honestly adorable!


	22. 22- A completely normal day

The thin, torn curtains did nothing to stop the impending daylight. It was a grey, murky day, and the muggy air stirred you awake. Obi-Wan was still asleep, but the two of you had shifted in your rest. His arm was wrapped securely around your waist, holding you against him. You felt warm all over, but you didn't exactly mind the position you were in. Its felt right, like your body was made to slot against his. You didn't try and pull away, only shut your eyes again and snuggle back into sleep, allowing yourself to bask in his lingering scent, shuffle further back against him and pretend as if this was how you had always slept. 

Obi-Wan eventually woke up too, but he was much quicker to panic. 

"Satine?" He exclaimed, then froze. No, that wasn't her in this bed- it was you. How many times had he woke up to someone beside him? It was few and far between, and the last time had been her, but this was different. 

This time he didn't feel as guilty. 

It was worse right, to not feel bad for this? He should be freaking out, should be throwing you out of bed and trying to forget what had happened. But instead, you looked perfectly natural beside him. He was still ashamed, but the happiness he felt when touching you, it outweighed this. It was like the universe knew what was happening was right, and therefore it didn't matter what the order had to say about it. 

Nevertheless, Obi-Wan slipped out of bed, trying his best not to disturb you. He went into the bathroom and waited for the tap to run water instead of black sludge, which could be some time. He rubbed the mirror with his sleeve and looked at himself. His cheeks were flushed, and the redness was spreading across his neck, like his entire body had been warmed by the feeling of lying next to you. He took deep, slow, breathes, trying to calm himself. It was an accident, accidents happened, nobody had to know- and you were still asleep, so it wasn't like you had to find out either. You'd probably be upset if you knew, so it was best that you'd didn't. Obi-Wan smiled, his skin was returning to its usual colour, and the water was finally starting to come out of the tap.

He washed his face, the cold water helping to settle him. Then he got dressed. When he saw you still sleeping, he smiled to himself, pretending he had never lied in that bed at all. No, he had slept on the sofa, or maybe the spare bed, not there, not next to you- definitely not holding you as close as humanly possible. No, he would never do such a thing. 

Obi-Wan found Anakin's room and knocked on the door. He was partly awake, and sloppily dressed, but at least he didn't suspect anything. He did smile knowingly, though, and he did ask a strange question the moment Obi-Wan entered the room,

"Did you have fun last night?"

"As much fun as you can have eating the slop they pack for us, but other than that it was quite pleasant." Obi-Wan chuckled to himself, sitting down on the end of Anakin's bed. 

"I bet it was." Anakin was still smirking at him, as if this were all some big joke

"What do you mean by that?" Obi-Wan asked, 

"Oh, you know. Two people, one bed, a shady hotel- it doesn't take a genius." 

Obi-Wan swallowed. Then he furrowed his brows at Anakin. He was scowling, too, just for good measure. He didn't say it out loud, but he knew what Anakin was implying. Anakin laughed, waving off Obi-Wan's annoyed look with a hand, 

"Relax, I'm kidding. Anyway, where is she?"

"Still asleep, I didn't want to wake her. We've got a long day ahead of us, she deserves the rest."

"I guess I'm not privileged to the same treatment?"

"Of course you're not, now come on, lets see if we can find a decent breakfast around here." 

~~~~~~~~

When you woke for the second time, the bed was empty. Obi-Wan wasn't in the room at all, and you were alone. You were a little nervous, it was unusual for Obi-Wan to leave you without saying something, but you tried to calm yourself. He was capable of looking after himself, and Anakin was always around if anything went wrong. He was just the down the hall, you assured yourself, Obi-Wan was probably with him. You dressed and went to Anakin's room, only to find the door locked. Knocking, you heard no response from the other side. 

Now you were more worried, if the two of them had gone somewhere together, that left you very much on your own- and you didn't like that idea too much. You decided the safest place was your room, so you went back. Double-checking the door was locked, you sat down on your bed. Was Obi-Wan upset about what had happened? Is that why he left so suddenly? Maybe he was hiding in Anakin's room, avoiding you. Maybe they had gone back to the Jedi, to report what you had done. It was all your fault, you should have moved away as soon as you saw what was going on. You put your face in your hands, you were so stupid. Why hadn't you moved away? Something in your mind had stopped you, some primal instinct forced you to remain in his arms, and you hated yourself for it. Obi-Wan didn't seem the type for romance, and from Anakin had told you- marriage seemed outright forbidden. He could never let himself love you, even if he did have feelings for you, he was too loyal to act on them. 

You realised then, that no matter how much Obi-Wan loved you, it would never be enough to let him show it. The Jedi Order came first for him, always. You would always be an after-thought, and you would certainly never be anything more than his friend. 


End file.
